20 weeks and 1 day

Yippee, Shim is halfway done cooking! Only 4 more weeks until we reach viability, then every day counts! I have had a busy day packing and getting organized for our trip. Here is the run down for those who don't know. Venice and Santorini have for YEARS been the two places I just gotta go visit. I told Eric I wouldn't have kids until we went to both places. So, earlier this year I started planning our "procreation vacation", since I'll be 30 in October. It consists of a few days in Rome, then a 12 day Mediterranean cruise, then a long weekend in Santorini. It was supposed to be our babymoon, but turns out we'll be celebrating Shim's imminent arrival instead. So, we leave on Thursday, and I have been really busy getting everything planned, organized, and packed. Eric doesn't do much to contribute, which works out great since I'm a control freak when it comes to traveling. I love it, and love to plan how I want it all to go. Eric is happy just to pack the night before, and grab his passport on the way out the door. Yet another reason I love him:-) We will not be doing any phone calls or (blackberry) emails while there due to the ridiculous cost. However, my goal is to pop into an internet cafe from time to time and update this site. It's how our families will know we're safe and having a fabulous time. I can't wait to get home and put all the pics up on my Mac gallery.

I've been asked quite a bit about why I'm traveling while pregnant. My answer (which is really a response to MANY questions/comments) is this: "I am pregnant, not invalid." This trip was planned before I was preggers, and I'm not about to cancel it. And even if it wasn't planned, I might have done so really quickly--b/c I don't know when we'll get the chance again. The biggest risk to me/Shim is the fact that the flight is long, and preggos are at increased risk for DVT's. (Deep vein thrombosis) So, that's an easy one. I pee constantly. All those trips up and down the aisle to the potty will keep the blood moving in my legs. Another thing I'll be doing is wearing Ted hose. Basically, they are really tight compression hose that surgical pt's wear to prevent blood clots during surgery. Conveniently enough, I work in an operating room. It just so happens we have plenty of those around, and I can have a pair. So, that's the biggest risk, and that's what I'm doing about it.

And yes, I have the permission of my midwives. The only stipulation is that I take a copy of my medical records with me. Seeing as to how I have an appt the afternoon before I leave, that will be easy enough.

I've been asked about the "what if" I go into preterm labor. Without going into an extreme amount of detail, here goes. 24 weeks is viablity. Before that, there aren't really any NICU's that will attempt to save a fetus/baby. The survival rate is pretty darn low. Cruise lines won't let passengers who are 24 weeks or further cruise for this reason. So, if I were to have Shim, there is nothing a hospital could do, whether it be here in Charlotte, or in Europe. And heck, the countries we are going to have lower maternal/fetal death rates anyways. One could argue that I'd be better off there in preterm labor. Okey dokey, enough on that soapbox.

My sister in law Dianna is due on Tuesday, so we are all impatiently waiting for the first Kirsch baby to arrive anytime! Ironically enough, it appears he's being stubborn like the rest of the Kirsch men. My sweet husband kept my dear MIL in labor for days. But don't worry, I've already had a talk with Shim about that and he understands it's simply not acceptable.

My belly has really popped in the last week or two, so maybe I'll get Eric to take a picture tomorrow. If not, there are going to be more than enough in the next 3 weeks. I'm really starting to feel quite pregnant. I felt Shim kick twice this week, so that was alot of fun. I can't wait until it's more regular so Eric can feel it! I have a sneaking suspicion I have an anterior placenta, (meaning it sits in front of my uterus), which is why I don't feel him often. I listen to him frequently, so I know he's doing just fine in there. And on a side note, I simply don't know how other preggos survive without a doppler. I'd be going psycho waiting 4 weeks b/t appts to know everything is fine.

I bought little man a diaper bag this week. It's modern and doesn't look babyish, and it was 30% off! Yippee skippee! I also bought a onesie that says "Sorry girls, I only date models". And then a second onesie that says "the dog did it". They are both quite cute.

Okay, I've gotta get going....there is more packing and organizing to do!

Congrats to Boffhoff!!!

I just wanted to give a big Congratulations to our friends Mike and Kim who were engaged yesterday! Kim is straight up Italian, and they love to go for pizza on weekends. But yesterday, the pizza came out looking a little strange. It all became a little more clear when Kim looked up and saw the ring in Mike's hand. We're so happy for you guys!

Sunday update

So, I am 18 weeks and 2 days now. Things are going as expected, except for the nausea. I'm still nauseated everyday, and even threw up again this week. I got my Zofran refilled, so hopefully that will help. My next appt is September 3rd, with the big anatomy scan. I'm nervous, but happy to see Shim again. Now as far as calling him 'Shim'; I've been told I should stop since we know he's a boy. But he's always been Shim to me, and that's what I'll continue to call him. I'm just not going to change it halfway through my pregnancy.

Only two more weeks until my SIL Dianna is due, and I can't wait to be an aunt! Shim and her little boy will be best buddies.

Eric and I leave in about 2 1/2 weeks for Europe, and I'm getting really excited. I did alot of planning and organizing yesterday, trying to get all our documents in order. Today I need to run some errands, such as getting my camera repaired. Luckily it's my small digital, not my SLR. I think sand got in it at the beach.

Hope everyone has a great week!

18 weeks and 2 days...

Eric in the garage, working hard at refinishing the furniture that will go in Shim's room. It's going to be black, and it looks really good so far.

A cute outfit I got before I knew Shim was a him. LOVE Tj maxx!
My friend Jen at work has a two year old little boy, and gave me a bunch of clothes. They are so cute!
A bib that says how much Shim loves his puppies. I sure hope Shim and Lucy & Linus are BFF.
Again, I love TJ Maxx. I got these really cool bins, which go with my nursery design of white, black, and red. This one we are going to put a red cloth liner in, and use for stuffed animals.
This one will be a trashcan for Shim's room.
A cute basket that doesn't yet have a purpose. Maybe to help organize my cloth diaper stash.
Yep, the belly is growing! I love these maternity jeans; they are so comfy.
I've even got quite the noticeable belly in clothes.

Ultrasound pic

Okay, I had to add this one b/c it's just too cute. Shim is playing lasso with his umbilical cord, and you can see his little legs and penis plain as day. Isn't he just adorable?

The Shim-meister!

Shim is a ............

So when I woke up this morning, I knew beyond the shadow of a doubt that I simply could not wait one more day to know what Shim is. For 17 weeks I've wanted a surprise, but this morning it became clear- I HAD TO KNOW!!! So, I called a local ultrasound place (ya know those 3d/4d places), and they fit me in for 2pm. They were running a 10 minute 2D gender scan special for $42.50! I was totally into it, so took the appt and called Eric. The first 5 minutes or so, the umbilical cord was right between the legs. Then Shim decided to start playing lasso with it, and scooted it right out of the way for us. Then the moment of truth- I WAS RIGHT! I just knew Shim was a BOY! There was a cute little penis for all the world to see.....I love having confirmation of my mother's intuition. So, the pics are below, and my next goal is to get up the videos! Check back later tonight to see if I'm that computer saavy...

What is a doula?

When I tell people I'm hiring a doula to be present at Shim's birth, I often am met with blank stares. Well, except in Charlotte, b/c they are more common here. But from most people, I just get questions and confusion. So, I thought I would dedicate an entire post to what a doula is, and why I want one. Here is a quick description:

A doula is a non-medical assistant who provides various forms of non-medical support (physical, emotional and informed choice) in the childbirth process. Based on a particular doulas training and background, the doula may offer support during prenatal care, during childbirth and/or during the postpartum period. A birth doula is a continuous care provider for labor in many settings. Thus a labor doula may attend a home birth or might attend the parturient woman during labor at home and continue while in transport and then complete supporting the birth at a hospital or a birth center.
The word doula comes from Greek δοῦλα, and refers to a woman of service. In Greece, the word has negative connotations, denoting "slave", as some doulas have inadvertently discovered through their international social networks. For this reason, some women performing professional labor support choose to call themselves labor companions or birthworkers. Anthropologist Dana Raphael first used the term doula to refer to experienced mothers who assisted new mothers in breastfeeding and newborn care in the book Tender Gift: Breastfeeding (1973)[citation needed]. Thus the term arose initially with reference to the postpartum context, and is still used in that domain. Medical researchers Marshall Klaus and John Kennell, who conducted the first of several randomized clinical trials on the medical outcomes of doula attended births, adopted the term to refer to labor support as well as prenatal and postpartum support.[1]
Labor/birth support doulas are labor support persons who attend to the emotional and physical comfort needs of laboring women to smooth the labor process. They do not perform clinical tasks such as heart rate checks, or vaginal exams but rather use massage, aromatherapy, reflexology, positioning suggestions, etc., to help labor progress as well as possible. A labor/birth support doula joins a laboring woman either at her home or in hospital or birth center and remains with her until a few hours after the birth. Some doulas also offer several prenatal visits, phone support, and one postpartum meeting to ensure the mother is well informed and supported. The terms of a labor/birth doula's responsibilities are decided between the doula and the family. In addition to emotional, physical and informational support, doulas work as advocates of their client’s wishes and may assist in communicating with medical staff to obtain information for the client to make informed decisions regarding medical procedures.

So, I have a labor doula, not a postpartum doula. Her name is Annette Rodgers, and she is also our hypnobabies instructor. (Hypnobabies will be my next post). She is also a certified massage therapist. You may be wondering why simply having Eric there won't be enough support. Honestly, he probably would be. But I think when he sees me in extreme pain, he won't be able to support my wishes for a natural child birth. He'll want me comfortable and happy, which will be drugs and an epidural. I truly don't know if I'll achieve the natural childbirth (NCB) I have envisioned. I may very well feel that first contraction and scream for the epidural. I won't get into all the reasons I personally want a NCB. The biggest one is my previous stated desire for the whole process to be normal and natural. I also want a perfectly alert and drug free baby.

Since my doula is a massage therapist, she'll use alot of massage and accupressure techniques during labor. She also will be able to help me focus on the hypnobabies techniques since she's the one teaching us that. More importantly, she'll be encouraging me the entire time that I CAN do it, that "my body knows this". This quote is my personal mantra for the entire labor process. Let's just hope it works....

Why I use a Midwife, and not an OB.....

So, it seems as if I get asked at least once a week, "Why do you use a midwife?". Or "How was your doctors appt?". Well folks, I don't ever see a doctor. I don't want to. I love my midwives. It all depends on how you choose to view pregnancy and childbirth. I see it as a normal, natural, and beautiful time in a woman's life. I have chosen pretty much to refuse all the genetic prenatal testing, except for the standard ultrasound and bloodwork. I have a very minimalist mentality, and prefer very few interventions in this beautiful process of bringing a child into this world. So, I thought I would post some info from the web to help everyone understand a little more about midwives.

A midwife is a trained professional with special expertise in supporting women to maintain a healthy pregnancy birth, offering expert individualized care, education, counseling and support to a woman and her newborn throughout the childbearing cycle.

The Midwives Model of Care is based on the fact that pregnancy and birth are normal life processes.

The Midwives Model of Care includes:

Monitoring the physical, psychological, and social well-being of the mother throughout the childbearing cycle
Providing the mother with individualized education, counseling, and prenatal care, continuous hands-on assistance during labor and delivery, and postpartum support
Minimizing technological interventions
Identifying and referring women who require obstetrical attention
The application of this woman-centered model of care has been proven to reduce the incidence of birth injury, trauma, and cesarean section.

A midwife works with each woman and her family to identify their unique physical, social and emotional needs. When the care required is outside the midwife's scope of practice or expertise, the woman is referred to other health care providers for additional consultation or care.

Midwives in the U.S.
There are two main categories of midwives in the U.S., nurse-midwives, who are trained in both nursing and midwifery, and direct entry midwives, who trained as midwives without being nurses first. Within the category of direct entry midwives are several subcategories reflecting the varying legal status of these midwives in different states and the fact that until recently there was no nationally recognized credential available for direct entry midwives. Direct entry midwives include highly trained and very competent midwives; however, anyone may call herself a midwife at this time, and if you are looking for a midwife, it is up to you to find out if the midwife is qualified and experienced to your satisfaction. If a midwife is a Certified Professional Midwife (CPM), you are at least assured that she has met specific requirements for certification (and re-certification every three years).

Now, with all that said, the midwives I use (there are four of them) are in a group practice with about 8 OB/GYN's. You can choose one or the other, or a mix. They tried a couple times to schedule me with an OB, but after making it very clear I had no intentions of seeing one unless my pregnancy became high-risk, they chilled out. Now they only offer the midwives when scheduling my next appt. There is still one more out of the four for me to meet. I figure when I'm going every 2 weeks, I'll definitely see her by then. I hope and pray to never meet a doctor in the practice, because that means I've become high risk and need interventions. Yuck!

Now, some people I'm sure are wondering, "But isn't a doctor better qualified than a midwife....Isn't there care better/safer/whatever?" The answer is they are trained longer, but not necessarily better. When a normal healthy woman is having a normal healthy baby, there is no reason a doctor is needed. Another reason I'm a big fan of midwives is because they are an advanced practive nurse, AKA a 'midlevel'. Well, I'm an advanced practive nurse. Would you refuse to let me put you to sleep b/c I'm not the almighty doctor? My husband and I are both considered midlevels. (Eric is a PA-physician assistant - for those who don't know). It seems kinda like common sense for a family of midlevels to choose another midlevel during such an important time in our lives. BTW, our midwives are all certified nurse midwives, not professional midwives. (See above for difference). CNM practice with OB's. Unfortunately, the state of NC and the state medical board make it extremely difficult for CPM's to practice here. Hence, home births are kinda hard to do unless you want to go unassisted. There just aren't enough CPM to go around for all the women who do want a home birth.

Now, home births. Do I think it's crazy? Not really. I considered it for about 15 seconds. But, I've seen to much crap go down at work, and honestly want to be close to an OR. A stat C-section is honestly my worst fear, but I want the facilties for it if I truly need it. I was reading on a bulletin board about this lady who couldn't find a midwife to accept her (b/c she and baby were high risk), so was gonna deliver at home with her hubby, unassisted. But of course, they were going to take the neonatal resusucitation course, so that makes it okay. ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FRIGGIN MIND? That was a little much for me, I had to quit reading on that message board. I think for healthy women with no complications, home birth may just be the way to go. Not for me...I'm not that granola yet:-)

Okay, enough rambling. I think my next post will be about doulas, since noone seems to know about them either. I've got alot of educating to do!

17 weeks

I had a checkup today, and it was with my favorite midwife Jan. I was happy Eric got to meet her. Everything looks fine, but they honestly don't do much at these appts. It's just a quick feel of my belly, and listen to the heartbeat for a minute or so.

We had two decisions to make. The first was whether we wanted AFP testing. It is basically blood work that tests for Downs and spina bifida. However, the testing has a really high rate of false positives, up to 30%. And since my philosophy and feelings on pregnancy and childbirth are very natural and minimalist, I turned them down. There is really no need, it's a waste of medical resources. We wouldn't attempt to terminate if it was positive; it would simply make us worry. And probably worry for NO reason, since there are so many false positives. I also turned down the early testing at 13 weeks for the same reasons. Shim is our child that we will love with all our hearts, no matter if he is perfectly healthy or not.

We also needed to decided if we wanted to just do our anatomy US in 4 weeks at the next appt, or come back in 2 for it. The reasoning for going back in 2 weeks would only be b/c we just couldn't wait to find out the sex. And we're still undecided there, so we'll just wait for our next appt. It kills two birds with one stone. The appt is September 3, the day before we leave for Europe. We'll take the US results with us to Europe and find out there, if we do at all. In other words, don't call us 18 million times on September 3, b/c we won't know the sex yet! (If we do decide to find out before birth).

My mom thinks I already know, and just won't tell her. Not true, but that is tempting. As soon as she finds out the sex, all she'll do is sew and smock. No cloth diapers or nursery bedding for Shim! I'm gonna have to stay on her to make sure she sews the things Shim really needs. She swears she will, so we'll see how that goes.

Lindsay found a boutique near her parents house in Kenmore (Buffalo) that actually sells cloth diapers, and they do registry's!!! So, she's gonna tell me what all brands they carry, and then create a registry for me up there. Then she'll add that to my invite so people know, and hopefully I'll get some cloth diapers at my Buffalo shower. She was amazed at how unbelievably soft they are! I love CD!!!

Ok, I gotta get going here, my P's will be here soon on their way back to Florence. We're gonna do lunch!

16 weeks

Good morning all! Eric and I have had a busy week just working....nothing eventful going on here at all. Eric did his first two sleep studies last night for his new company; it was a very big milestone for him. Hopefully things will continue to take off.
I was 16 weeks yesterday, so things are moving along nicely. I am still nauseated, but optimistic that it will go away soon! As long as it's gone by the time we leave for Europe, I'll be happy. I have a checkup this Thursday, but it'll be uneventful. Just a quick weigh in and FHT check. (fetal heart tones). We'll make our appt for our ultrasound, so that's exciting and nerve-wracking. I'm excited to see Shim again, but the anatomy US scares me. I just want to see all four chambers of the heart, and all the other organs. Make sure the head is the right size, take a look at the spine. There are SO many things that can go wrong with development, and I see them all the time at work. So while everyone else is flipping out about whether it's a boy or girl....I honestly don't care two cents worth. I'm a million more times concerned with the other anatomy. The anatomy that really matters! People take for granted healthy children, and assume their baby will be born completely normal. I don't have that luxury (to assume that) b/c my work is a daily reminder otherwise.
My appt next week is with my favorite midwife, so that makes me happy. I've missed her! Her name is Jan, and she's from Wales. She has the coolest accent, and is the sweetest woman ever. I would pay big money for her to be the one to deliver Shim. It's a crapshoot though, all according to who is on call. I've met 3 out of the four midwives, and hear good things about the one I haven't met. There is one I wasn't crazy about.....but I'm withholding judgement until we see her again. She saw in my chart that I'm a CRNA, and made a blanket assumption about me that really pissed me off. I won't go into it, but I'm giving her a second chance.
Eric's business partner is getting married today, and we have her reception tonight. Once again, I'm earning my title of "9 month DD". I'll take a pic of me all pregnant and dressed up with my handsome hubby.