Frustrated

I cannot even begin to explain my frustrations of yesterday. Thank God for this amazing Dr. Rogers who came into my life at just the right moment! I've been coughing for a week now, and yesterday my throat and right ear really started to hurt. I knew immediately that it was either strept throat or tonsillitis. And probably an ear infection. I called my drs office here, and after 2 1/2 hours they still hadn't returned my call. When I got off work, I just headed over there. I figured one of three things would have to happen. They'd either work me in, just give me an rx, or tell me to go to urgent care. The first thing to ruffle my feathers a bit is that the girl at check in was a tee-total-bitch. She was livid that I just showed up. Well, if your staff would have called me back, then this wouldn't be an issue. If I had a fever, or chills, or any true flu symptoms, I would've never gone in public. But here's the deal: I'm an educated health care professional, and I know my body. I knew damn well I didn't have the flu.

So, they move me to a separate room where I'm all alone. No biggie; actually a smart move on their part. I wait 15 minutes, then a nurse shows up with two pieces of paper. One is a prescription for Tamiflu (the treatment for swine flu). The other is an order, so I can go to the hospital and get tested for the swine flu. She instructs me to start taking the medicine immediately, without waiting for results. Also a decent idea, IF ONLY I HAD THE FRIGGIN FLU!!! I was livid. I looked at her in disbelief, and said "Do you realize that not ONE person has asked me about my symptoms, or examined me or assessed me?" She had nothing to say for about 10 seconds. Then she looks down, and says that her papers say I've had a fever and cough. WRONG! No fever you ding-dongs. I proceed to tell her (she still hadn't asked) what my symptoms were, and the history of this particular illness. I told her that what I needed was actually an antibiotic. She went back to talk to the doctor (who still wouldn't see me, I think she's afraid of swine flu), only to come back and say tough stuff. No antibiotic, but we will add a strept screen to your lab orders. Well, thanks alot. Thanks for your superb care, and listening to your patients. I asked where I was supposed to go for these tests, since they couldn't do them. Oh, just the hospital. No biggie she says, just register as an outpatient. I was beyond livid at this point. It was such horrible care. I hope and pray I NEVER give such inadequate care to a patient of mine.

So I get in my car still fuming. I drive my fuming self right on over to some place called "Doctors Care". It's an urgent care center, and I'm now in love with that place. I see this fabulous man named Dr. Rogers, who has been a pediatrician and family doctor for over 45 years. He comes in, and first asks me about all my symptoms. NOVEL idea there. He then looks in my throat and eyes, and informs me I have a strept infection. Such a shocker. He then looks in my ears, and says I have ear infections. And then this kind and amazing man gives me a prescription for an antibiotic. Thanks for doing an assessment and listening to me. I feel better already, after just three doses of Amoxicillin.

I know and understand that the H1N1 flu is serious, and can be life threatening. I get it. I don't get a refusal to listen to your patients, or to assess them. That's just unacceptable.

Working Woman

I started my job today, but there isn't much to report. I did the whole hospital orientation thing, then headed over to the department for about 30 minutes. Tomorrow is more paperwork, and finding my way around. Hopefully by Wednesday I'll be back to knocking people out!

Drake has been going to bed so early! Between 6 and 7. He's just so tired after dinner and a bath, that he sacks out with the last bottle. He does stay in the crib 12 hours, but sometimes he will wake up a couple of times. He's usually back asleep within 5 minutes. About 1-2 times per week he will throw a massive fit, and get to sleep with mommy and daddy for the rest of the night. We all love it, to be honest, but are trying not to start that habit. I really hope to take some photos of him soon and get them up.

Eric and I are headed to Greenville this weekend for my friend Adriann's wedding. That will definitely be a good time!

We joined the big fitness center here today. Big thumbs down to them not having an outside pool. I miss the Y's in Charlotte something fierce. We didn't know how good we had it with the gyms there! I've been pondering lately. If I'm "home", then why am I so homesick? I'm assuming we just need to give it a little more time to settle in here. For it to only be 2 and 1/2 hours from Charlotte, these two places could not be more different. It's hard to explain, but I feel as if I've been having a major culture shock. I forgot so much about Florence, and it's people and places. It is SO different from Charlotte, in SO many ways. I'm not saying it's all bad, just very different. I just feel like the people, from our neighbors to friends to coworkers, just all "get" Eric and I, like people here don't seem to. Of course, there are the exceptions, like my parents and old friends from college. I'm gonna give it all the benefit of the doubt, and assume we just need to give people more time to get to know us. One big positive; we are loving having the grandparents nearby. Eric's parents come next week, and we can't wait! Although I have no idea what they will do here for a week. I guess just play with Drake! My parents will probably take them to the beach for a night or two.

I can't wait to get my schedule for work. I'm going to plan a nice long romantic weekend at Grove Park Inn and spa. I see a massage and pedicure in my future!

How refreshing; and a little more on H1N1

It seems that there are a few people that take my blog for what it is; a chance to share what works for my family. It was really refreshing to read positive feedback for a change. Here is what one dear soul had to say:

"Niki-
I have to tell you thank you for your blog. I have been reading it for quite awile now. (I was WTTC around the time you got pregnant so I saw you in WTTC grads). I do not plan on doing everything you have done as a mother, I am just not the "crunchy" person, but I totally respect all of your choices and opinions. I do not understand how anything you said can be seen as anything more than your opinion. You have stated more than once that the things written are how YOU feel about life and never once have I felt as though you have been trying to push your ways on anyone else. However your blog alone it the reason I started doing my own research on a number of things, NCB, cloth diapering, delaying vax's and not starting solids till 6 months for example. I learned things that I had NO clue about thanks to you and I feel as though it will help me to be a better mother to my daughter just because I now can make truly educated choices. Please do not let people get you down and keep blogging just as you have been, people are truly learning from it and I hate that some women are so childish that they feel as though they have to belittle you for what you think.
Sorry this got so long but I wanted to let you know that you are doing a great job no matter what anyone else may say."

And another person who "gets me",
"Nikki, I already posted to this thread, but wanted to say that I love your blog. I check it all the time and I have never thought you have belittled anyone! You state what works for your family but you don't say that has to work for everyone. I think some people just like to feel attacked to make themselves feel better about their choices."

Another positive thing has happened lately. I've had not one but two people actually ask my opinion, or what I've found in research about the h1n1 vaccines. One momma pointed out that she didn't know there were variations of the vaccine. Well, most mommy's wouldn't. I guess they have a blind faith in their pediatrician to just make decisions for them, but this momma does not. We don't do any vaccines with thimerosal, or squalene, and is this is why.

The multi dose vials of vaccines often have "preservatives". The most well known is thimerosal. Here is what that is, in a nutshell, courtesy of the FDA's website.
"Thimerosal is a mercury-containing organic compound (an organomercurial). Since the 1930s, it has been widely used as a preservative in a number of biological and drug products, including many vaccines, to help prevent potentially life threatening contamination with harmful microbes. Over the past several years, because of an increasing awareness of the theoretical potential for neurotoxicity of even low levels of organomercurials and because of the increased number of thimerosal containing vaccines that had been added to the infant immunization schedule, concerns about the use of thimerosal in vaccines and other products have been raised. Indeed, because of these concerns, the Food and Drug Administration has worked with, and continues to work with, vaccine manufacturers to reduce or eliminate thimerosal from vaccines."

Now, from what the package inserts are saying, these H1N1 vaccines don't have squalene. At least from what I can tell from reading their reviews. So, that isn't an issue.

So, if the FDA is working with manufacturers to eliminate thimerosal from vaccines, why is it in the new H1N1 multi dose vials? Two answers: speed and money. Drug companies can make the vaccine faster and cheaper by doing it in a multi dose vial.

I'm not a mom that believes in some autism and vaccine conspiracy. I just believe in researching (alot) to find out what is best for my child. Not your child, but my child. And I just happen to believe that asking for a single dose syringe of the H1N1 vaccine is best for him. Here's hoping his peds office has it!

For additional info, here is what Dr. Sears has to say:
http://www.askdrsears.com/thevaccinebook/

Fun Weekend Planned

We are taking full advantage of another beautiful late summer/early fall weekend. I have my very first Bunco game tonight. And tomorrow is She Saturday, which is a local shopping event held once a year in Florence. After that, we may try to make it to a local family festival held at the local library. Photos to come, hopefully! We don't have much planned for Sunday, which is the way I like it since I start work on Monday. As much as I miss Drake when I work, I do really enjoy what I do. So I'm ready to jump back in the game.

Just a few thoughts on the weeks news. Beyonce is truly a classy woman. I'm thrilled the President called Kanye a jackass. That's awesome. I'm really happy the coach in Kentucky (was it Kentucky?) was found not guilty. I'm hope that family can get closure. I'm getting tired of hearing about H1N1. I don't think it's nearly as big of a deal as the media is hyping it up to be.

And as I'm sure you've guessed, Drake will probably not be getting the vaccine. He is SO fortunate to be watched by my Mom while Eric and I work, so he doesn't have the added risk of possible daycare exposure. Whether or not he gets it depends on which brands are available here. I will NOT give him one with mercury or squalene. He is due for his nine month appointment soon. I'll get my schedule when I start work next week, and will make his appt after that. I'm nervous about switching peds offices, because we were really happy with his care in Charlotte. I hope we'll find the same here. Hopefully the delayed and separated vaccinations won't be an issue. I'd hate to be the new bitchy mother to the practice, if anyone gives me crap.

Blog Changes

I changed my comments to where you have to be a member of my blog to comment. Now, I'm not really sure what you have to do to be a member of my blog. But I couldn't find an option to not allow commenting at all. I do enjoy thoughtful and intelligent comments, and hate to see comments go. But, I'd rather have it that way to keep away all the others that just piss me off. Absolutely asinine comments, with no basis, that are completely untrue. And certainly not ones that I'll ever publish. Suggestion: Quit attacking my family, just because yours is falling apart all around you.

Thought of the morning

In order to be unbelievably hateful and hurtful, I believe that someone must be very sad and miserable inside. I feel sorry for any unfortunate blog reader this applies to, and NO, I won't be publishing your untrue and asinine comments.

Thought of the day

Some people really are as "bad" as you think they are, and as nasty. While on the other hand, others aren't nearly as "good", and caring, as you think they are. True colors ALWAYS show.

FYI

I am copying and pasting the below information (in itlalics) from the natural living/attachment parenting board of the charlottemommies.com website. Before people run out and jump on the swine flu vaccine bandwagon, I hope they at *least* educate themselves to the ingredients and recommendations. I find it interesting that the mainstream media keeps saying how pregnant women will be/should be vaccinated first. Yet, the package inserts FROM THE MANUFACTURER flat out says "It is also not known whether these vaccines can cause fetal harm when administered to a pregnant woman or can affect reproduction capacity." Scary. I hope all pregnant women are actually made aware of this info, and not just bullied or scared into getting an unproven and untested vaccine. In that, I mean unproven and untested for pregnant women. If they just started trials a few months ago, then that means there is NO WAY a woman got it in the first trimester, and has had a term baby yet. So YES, that means it's untested.

The FDA has approved the Swine Flu Vax from the following manufacturers. Remember that at least two doses will likely be given. The following package inserts are available. There is not a Swine Flu shot recommended for under 6 months of age (but, during a pandemic, not sure if this still applies). Flu Mist is not recommended under the age of two. Read each package insert carefully. It seems like the multidose have mercury:


http://www.fda.gov/BiologicsBloodVaccines/Vaccines/ApprovedProducts/ucm181950.htm


Injectable Vaccines
Influenza A (H1N1) 2009 Monovalent Vaccine (CSL Limited)Mercury & No Mercury

Influenza A (H1N1) 2009 Monovalent Vaccine (Novartis Vaccines and Diagnostics Limited) Mercury

Influenza A (H1N1) 2009 Monovalent Vaccine (Sanofi Pasteur, Inc.) Mercury and no Mercury


Intranasal Vaccine (THIS IS A LIVE VIRUS)-No Mercury
(Influenza A (H1N1) 2009 Monovalent Vaccine (MedImmune LLC)

Ingredients:Each pre-filled refrigerated Influenza A (H1N1) 2009 Monovalent Vaccine Live, Intranasal sprayer contains a single 0.2 mL dose. Each 0.2 mL dose contains 106.5-7.5 FFU of the live attenuated influenza virus reassortant of the pandemic (H1N1) 2009 virus: A/California/7/2009 (H1N1)v. Each 0.2 mL dose also contains 0.188 mg/dose monosodium glutamate, 2.00 mg/dose hydrolyzed porcine gelatin, 2.42 mg/dose arginine, 13.68 mg/dose sucrose, 2.26 mg/dose dibasic potassium phosphate, 0.96 mg/dose monobasic potassium phosphate, and <0.015>Influenza A (H1N1) 2009 Monovalent Vaccine (CSL Limited):

􀂃Indicated for active immunization of persons 6 months of age and older
supplied in four presentations:
Prefilled syringe, 0.25 mL, no preservative; distinguished by a pink syringe plunger rod (3)
Prefilled syringe, 0.5 mL, no preservative (3)
Single-dose vial, 0.5 mL, no preservative (3)
Multi-dose vial, 5 mL, contains thimerosal, a mercury derivative, added as a preservative. Each 0.5 mL dose contains 25 mcg mercury. (3, 11 )
􀂃Vaccine have not been established in pregnant women or nursing mothers or children <6>Description
The virus-containing allantoic fluid is harvested and inactivated with formaldehyde.Influenza virus is concentrated and purified in a linear sucrose density gradient solution using a continuous flow centrifuge. The virus is then chemically disrupted using a non-ionic surfactant, polyethylene glycol p-isooctylphenyl ether (Triton® X-100), producing a “split virus”. The split virus is further purified and then suspended in sodium phosphate-buffered isotonic sodium chloride solution.
Influenza A (H1N1) 2009 Monovalent Vaccine is formulated to contain 15 mcg hemagglutinin (HA) of influenza A/California/07/2009 (H1N1) v-like virus per 0.5 mL dose. Gelatin 0.05% is added as a stabilizer. Each 0.5 mL dose may contain residual amounts of formaldehyde (not more than 100 mcg), polyethylene glycol p-isooctylphenyl ether (not more than 0.02%), and sucrose (not more than 2.0%).
There is no thimerosal used in the manufacturing process of the single-dose presentations of Influenza A (H1N1) 2009 Monovalent Vaccine. The multi-dose presentation of Influenza A (H1N1) 2009 Monovalent Vaccine contains thimerosal, a mercury derivative, added as a preservative. Each 0.5 mL dose of the multidose presentation contains 25 mcg mercury.
--Neither Fluzone vaccine nor Influenza A (H1N1) 2009 Monovalent Vaccine have been evaluated for carcinogenic or mutagenic potential, or for impairment of fertility

Camp CARE and Make a Wish Foundation

I wanted to take a little time to highlight a great organization; actually two of them! When I was in Charlotte, my favorite patient population to take care of was the hem/onc kids. Meaning, hematology/oncology. Yep, that's kids with cancer. So unfair, yet a reality. And I just loved taking care of them. They come in frequently for spinal taps and bone marrow aspirations, so over time we'd get to know them with their families. It was from these patients that I first heard of Camp CARE. It's stands for Cancer Ain't Really the End. It's a nonprofit in Charlotte, that does monthly events plus a week long summer camp. And, it's all FREE for the kids. Each child can have one sibling also come to camp. Plus, the entire family is always welcome at the monthly events. I hate that I won't get to be closely involved anymore.

This is an awareness month for childhood cancer. And I feel the need to make a couple of things more well know. First off, the Leukemia and lymphoma society always uses a bald child in their campaigns to raise money. Yet, the majority of the money all goes to adult research. That's just wrong. Stores are always asking if I'd like to donate to St. Jude's. Now I'm sure it's a wonderful hospital, but they won't take patient's that have had previous treatment elsewhere. Again, I just think that's wrong. Hopefully someone will read this, and tell me these things have changed!!!

The other organization that I am a big fan of is Make A Wish. I've looked into becoming a volunteer for them, and hope to get that going in another year or so. I don't want to start unless I can make it a serious commitment. It's such a wonderful service they provide for children. And, it's not just children with cancer. That's a big part of who they serve, but it's not exclusive to just them.

Last summer, I got to go to Camp CARE's summer camp. I was one of five counselors in a cabin with 12 little girls. They ranged in age from 6-8. Some were in active treatment, some in remission, and some were siblings. We had an awesome cabin! It was an amazing and fulfilling week, despite being sick as a dog at 12 weeks preggo. Here are some pics from that great week!

The banner hanging.

The most EXCITING moment. The campers arriving!!!! They come on three big buses from Charlotte. It's such an emotionally charged moment. Of course, it could've been my hormones too.
Jumping off the (really really high) rope swing. Seriously, it was high. I wouldn't have done it even if I wasn't pregnant. These kids have GUTS!
Yes, they ate dessert with no hands. Yes, their faces were messy. Yes, they had a great time. Nothing a napkin couldn't handle. It was moments like this I loved the most, because the kids just got to be the type of kid they couldn't be at home.
My cabin all lined up for the big swim test.

The very first night of camp, the counselors and staff all "perform" for the campers. It's a great way to break the ice, and for them to get to see us being all silly. Kinda sets the tone for the week, ya know? Each day had a theme, and the first day was Christmas. Hence, each cabin was assigned a Christmas song to perform to. These guys below were my favorite; absolutely laugh out loud funny. They straight up performed to the Nutcracker music, and with completely straight faces.

That's right folks, there was a trapeze!!! This amazing family from Florida comes up (they are circus or either previous circus performers), and sets up their trapeze. Can you imagine??? I wanted to do it so bad, but was 12 weeks preggo with Drake. It was a no-go :-(
Of course, we had plenty of pool time. Another necessity of summer camp.
Me with some of my campers, all dressed up for the big dance. It was a highlight of the week for these girls.
Arts and crafts--summer camp just isn't complete without it!

A weekend in review

We managed to have a fun weekend in between the unpacking and organizing of our rental. Yesterday we went to a cookout at my parents house, to celebrate my Mom's birthday. The food was delish, and we got to visit with family. Then we headed over to my cousins house for the USC game. College football is HUGE here. In Charlotte, not so much. Yet another adjustment to make, and I guess another team to cheer for. I've tried to explain to my sweet Yankee husband that a USC game and it's tailgating does indeed rival the Buffalo Bills. He doesn't believe me yet, so I guess I'll just have to take him to a game. The biggest difference is the way people dress. My friends from Charlotte and I used to talk/laugh about it. See, these are girls who went to UC Santa Barbara, and Arizona. They are PAC 10 girls. And apparently, the dress for college football games on the west coast is EXTREMELY different from the south. No dresses, jewelry, and tons of makeup out there. You can find them in jeans, jersey, and a painted face. (From what I've heard). My friend Gen lives in Columbia now, and is adjusting to the fact the USC games are a fashion show. The dress for the games is also very different from Buffalo. There is the obvious reason, in that 80% of their games are probably COLD! But even the semi-warm ones won't find ladies all dolled up. It's just not the way they do it. So, I'm excited to take Eric to see what an entirely different environment it is. This is one big country, and the differences go as far as football attire. I like different though. Different doesn't mean wrong, but it's when people think it does, that panties (or boxers) get all in a wad.

Okay, back to our weekend. So we watched a little bit of the game, and Drake was a little alarmed at the yelling. It was his training for me and Eric watching the Panther's play on Sundays. We headed home to get him in bed, and this tired Mommy followed him.

Today we managed some more unpacking, then managed to scam some leftovers from my parents. Fabulous, no cooking! I'm liking that. After little man's nap, we decided to do some Florence exploring. We headed to a local deli/bar that has outside seating and great sandwiches. I was digging a club sandwich. Well, wouldn't you know it- the deli part was closed on Sundays. I'm not very happy with how extreme the blue laws are here, and how seriously they are taken. I'm used to things being open! Alas, we are in the bible belt, so we'd better adjust. We hopped to the restaurant next door, and grabbed an early dinner. Then we took the Drakester to the park for some swinging, and a walk on the greenway. Here in Florence, they call the greenway the "rail trail". We didn't go far, because Drake was tired and we could see a melt down coming. But we did go far enough to see there is a neighborhood that backs up to it, and it's one that we would consider living in. It's kinda fun exploring all these different neighborhoods, trying to find one that fits our family.

Our realtor in Charlotte did an open house yesterday, and showed it to five people. Two of them were promising she said, so we'll see. Cross your fingers folks!!! I would just love if our house sold soon, and then we could save some major money while house hunting. I'm not loving the rental, but it does serve it's purpose.

I'm off all week, since my job doesn't start until the 21st. I've got lots to accomplish. Tomorrow starts with errands and a hair appointment. This hair seriously needs a new do!

I've decided...

There is nothing I love more than rocking my Drakey to sleep. Nothing. It absolutely doesn't get any better than that.

Discoveries.....

I discovered today that there is Thai and Vietnamese food here in Florence, and I'm thrilled. AND there's an Irish pub. I'm ecstatic! I'm also a big fan of the new SuperWalmart, but not for meats and veggies. I sure do miss Earthfare for those!

In other news, can anyone share with me how to make a new blog invite only? And once you do it, can you remove people previously accepted? I need a blog inservice! My new blog, whenever I get around to making it, will be invite only. I'm tired of bitchy comments from bitchy readers who think NOTHING like I do. This way, I can accept people who actually like the things I blog about. Or if they don't like it, can respect that I think differently from them. I honestly just think it makes more sense that way, at least for me. The negative energy of rude blog readers comments is just annoying me. So for anyone offended, angry, or feeling belittled.....no worries. You won't even be tempted with my blog, since you'll no longer be able to access it. Problem solved!

I'm very disappointed with the Today show. They did a segment on homebirthing that was very one sided, and only presented very slanted research. I hope women do a variety of research when making birthing decisions.

Thought of the day

Today's random thought is that I feel sorry for children who's parents wouldn't let them watch President Obama's speech. I feel sorry for them because they missed the speech, but more so because their parents are morons. I wish Drake was old enough to understand it.

In other news, I'll be starting a new blog shortly. One for all of my ramblings, and then this one for my family. This one will share all our news and adventures, plus plenty of cute pictures of Drake.

My thoughts and very opinionated opinions will be moving to a new blog. I'm sure it'll piss plenty of people off. Not my problem though. This way, it'll allow our family and friends to keep up with us, without always having another random post about what's on my mind. I think this is one of the better ideas I've had in a long while.......

Other women's two cents....

This post is about other women's opinions. My two cents is posted two below this one, under the recent photos.

I asked around to the ladies on a natural childbirth message board that I frequent, to get some other opinions. Here is what I asked:

1. What wishes have you not had followed in the hospital? What have you had to ~fight~ for? What have you been belittled about?

2. Do you think elective C/S and inductions should be allowed, for no medical reason?

3. Are you like me, you don't really care as long as ALL women's choices are respected?

4. If you've never had a baby in a hospital, maybe you can share WHY you avoided it.

And here is a synopsis of the responses I got:
T.W. says, "But one nurse literally stabbed me with a needle to do a heplock even though I didn't want one, and the doctor said I didn't need it. But this nurse was crazy and kept stabbing at me. I disagree with elective c-sections and inductions, but I can't make people's choices for them and if they want to do it then that is their choice. It's just something I don't agree with."

M.O. says, "I haven't had any experiences with actual birth yet, but so far I've been pretty happy with the way both my doctor and hospital have reacted about my wishes for a natural birth. The only thing I haven't liked so far is I've gotten an occasional vibe that I think I'm a know-it-all for wanting a natural birth. For the most part my doctor has had very open dialogue about it, but occasionally she'll say something wanting me to explain myself or my wishes instead of being calm about it. Which makes me feel very small. It's definitely not appreciated when people do their own research. I can see both sides of the c-section argument. While I personally don't feel this way, some people have a tremendous fear of giving birth vaginally. The unknown is just too much for some people and they would rather be able to plan when the baby is coming and sort of "know" what the recovery entails (aka that of major surgery). So while I don't think elective c-sections should be encouraged, I really can't say that I don't think they shouldn't have them at all because some people are different. Just like how I'd do anything in my power to have a natural birth, some people really feel the same way about cesarians. I do think that there should be a bigger movement to expose all women, not just the ones who seek the information, to the possible joys of a natural birth and the concept that birth is a natural, instinctual process, and that both the woman's body and the baby know what to do. There are definitely situations where this does not hold true, but if people thought more positively about birth, I think it would bring the Csection rate down tremendously. As for insulting people about getting elective c-sections, I have mixed feelings about that, too. Birth is such a personal and life changing moment, that no one wants to feel that they were shortchanged with theirs. So its a pretty sensitive subject to say someone's way of birth was wrong when they have a child that they know and love as a result of it. On the other hand, I think everyone has the right to say how they feel and that both by you blogging about your feelings and people responding that they are insulted is a natural and acceptable communication. If I was going to be blogging I would want people to know about how I actually felt deep down, with no fluff, rather than sugar coat things and have it be superficial."

P.Q. says, "I avoided the hospital because I didn't want to have to fight anyone to get the birth I wanted. I am not sure how the hospital would have been, and I know my DH would have been fantastic at keeping everyone in line, but I really loved that he also got to enjoy our daughter's birth instead of having to keep one eye on all the medical staff. To me, hospitals are for the sick. Pregnancy isn't a disease. "

D.M. says," Since I have a good amount of experience attending planned natural births (as a doula) at the hospital I would go to if I couldn't have a homebirth I'll give you my *if only* answers. I would have to fight to have intermittent monitoring, even though ACOG sets that as the standard. I've never seen it allowed. I would have to know my rights to refuse routine GBS+ antibiotics if I wanted not to have them, likely with scare tactic lectures. I'd also have to go out of my way to wear my own clothing and play CDs. Delayed cord clamping would likely not be respected, and frequent vaginal exams would be done roughly and on the hour unless I REALLY stood up against that. Other interventions would be pushed- like pitocin or a cesarean, and pushing would be limited to on my back once the perineum was bulging. I'd fight to push in a gravity positive position and probably have to make threats to get to eat in labor and have DH catch. If me and my support people weren't on the ball I'd likely get a episiotomy without consent. Pain meds would be offered frequently unless I got really lucky with one of only a few NCB friendly nurses, and I'd get scare tactic speeches when refusing all the routine newborn procedures. Photos of pushing and birth would be banned, but I'd fight that too. I think medical procedures should not be done electively. Convenience inductions are a huge issue, and make birth less safe for mom and baby. Knowing the facts I cannot understand why someone would choose to induce or have a cesarean without need. "

M.B. says, "I am against elective sections... I personally am being my own advocate for a natural childbirth... My OB is already talking of induction and possible section because I have gestational diabetes... I personally know that my body can do what it is meant to do... I have chosen to go with a midwife after a confrontational OB appointment. I want a natural childbirth for many reasons... And I am going to stay strong with having a NCB... Yes I have already had my mom laugh in my face tell me I will fail and end up getting meds but that laugh has made my convictions stronger.... I stand by any woman who has, wants, or attempts a NCB but will not down them if they end up having interventions done for whatever reason... I do get irritated with women who already choose interventions well in advance, despite knowing the facts and research well before birth."

M.J. says, "I'm like you, as long as a woman's wishes are respected I don't care! in the end as long as mom and baby are happy and healthy that's all that matters. i had a NCB in a hospital and didn't have to 'fight' for anything. my MW did mention maybe breaking my water if i wanted to and I said no and she said no problem. my birth was quick, but they left us alone. my MW was right outside in the hallway and when we asked for a birth ball they were back with it in less than a minute. my nurses were wonderful and my MW was amazing. I think they didn't bother me because they knew I was there with a MW, and the MWs obviously follow different rules than the OB's. They didn't even attempt to put in an IV or anything! I did have to have monitoring but I was able to stand and it didn't bother me. I actually liked having my support team tell me when the contraction was ending. It was comforting for me."

From M.G., who's little stinker baby turned transverse during labor at a birth center, "A c section should NEVER EVER EVER be elective. It is major surgery and shame on any doctor who preforms one which is not medically necessary. The risks are too high. If someone is afraid of a vaginal birth, then get over it, or don't get pregnant. A woman I know got an elective section because she was afraid to deliver vaginally. It made me sick. I know a few people who had elective sections and I never agreed with one situation. I was at the birth center for about 24 hours before my hospital transfer. After the baby was born, the midwife made sure I got to hold her and breastfeed her before she was cleaned up. I had to fight to keep her in my room 24/7. They wanted me to stay for four days, we were there about 40 hours total. I had to specifically make sure I was not given any medicine that would alter my mental state. All I took was IV motrin and 1/2 dose percocet. It was VERY important to me to be present for the arrival of my baby, to breastfeed as soon as possible, and to take care of her best I could given the situation. Multiple times I had to refuse medicine they wanted to give me. As long as i got my motrin on time, I was ok with the pain from the surgery. I wanted to avoid a hospital birth for many reasons. The advantages of birthing at the birth center are HUGE-- -comfortable, relaxed environment -intermittent monitoring with doppler -able to walk, bathe, go outside, etc, during labor -able to eat during labor -labor and delivery in any position suitable for you and the baby -care and respect of the midwives and nurses -the bonding post birth -the short stay at the birth center post birth. -the home visit post birth by the midwife or nurse" From

M.S. "My 1st 2 children were induced on my due date - no medical reason - and I didn't know any better. My 3rd child I my water started leaking and I went into labor on my own, on my due date. Even though I was contracting 1 min apart, I was in denial that I was in labor. Afterall, I had only ever experienced pitocin contrax. So I sat around home for hours before finally going to the hospital. When I arrived my contractions were almost back to back and I was 6 cm dilated. Sounds pretty far to me!! Well my OB told me he was going to start pit to "speed things up". I told him there was no way, I was progressing just fine on my own. (This was at 6pm). Then he kept urging me to get the epidural. He said "There is No way you can do this without it". I told him if I went through 2 pitocin deliveries, the first being 29 hours long, with NO epidural or pain meds, I could do it this time too. But he continued to tell me there was no way I could do it. 3 hours 7 minutes later my son was born with no pitocin and no epidural after stalling at 7cm for 2 hours due to him being posterior. I too am very against elective inductions/c-sections especially for reasons of 'convenience'. I've seen women choose to be induced at 37 weeks, or even earlier, just so certain family members could be there. Then came all the "why me's" when their little ones were in the NICU for days or even weeks. The only reason I find "legit" for a schedule c-sect before the due date is if it is dangerous for the mother - or baby - for that mother to go into labor. But inductions because a mom is just 'tired of being pg' or to be sure to get a certain Dr. or have certain family members there - I just find that wrong and dangerous. All 6 of my children were born at the hospital, first 3 by OB's, my last 3 (and this one will be) by a midwife. My last 3 were the best experiences I've ever had. No drug pushers, no being tied down by monitors, etc."

W. D. says, "I do not agree with elective cesareans. Even though I had one. Of course, it was a repeat, but I didn't know any better and I was scared into it. Like many others have pointed out, there are so many reasons why they are wrong. I don't think a woman should ever have an elective cesarean for a first birth, unless there is a medical reason...but then, that wouldn't be elective, would it? However, I feel it is up to a woman to decide what she wants. I also think, that if women were told the *true* risk factors of each birthing option...vaginal, C/S, ERCS, VBAC...and aren't being given scare tactics about any of the options, just the facts...then I'd feel better about the choice they make. I didn't really have to fight, per say, for anything in the hospital. I had to search really hard to find a hospital and OB that didn't have a ban on VBA2C's, though. I ended up having to drive over 2 hours. That was not fun when I went past my due date and had to get NST's 2 times a week! In the hospital I had to have a hep-lock and CFM. I didn't want those, but I was willing to compromise to be able to attempt my VBA2C. My midwife was truly a midwife. She came to the hospital and stayed until my baby was born. She was a great advocate for me. She is the one that told the nurses, "She is not in ANY pain, and she refuses to answer that question. Please don't ask it again."

A.P. just wanted to ditto how fabulous a birth center was! She had a great experience at one with her daughter.

L.L says, " Just a first timer so no first hand experience yet, but I am very passionate that Elective C/S and Inductions should NOT be allowed. Well, actually scratch that, they should be allowed if the mommy wants to pay for it out of pocket. They should NOT be covered by insurance. It's unnecessary intervention that is driving up our health care costs and it makes me sick to my stomach. Not to mention, the risks are NOT fully discussed with the mommies (and I mean long term fertility risks - not just scarring, etc) - Elective procedures should be treated as such and doctors should be paid incentives if they can keep their elective procedures to a minimum. No matter how you look at it, it is very risky in so many ways."

E.L. says, "For my last 2 births (at the same hospital) I was able to get them to allow me to vary from hospital policy without a fight on the following things: I wore my own clothes I had intermittent monitoring I had infrequent cervical exams (probably more due to water being broken than to my request) Here are the things I had to fight on and I was not successful in winning these battles (hence the part of the reason for the doula this time to help back us up): - Hep-lock - they always want to give this to me immediately even though they don't have any reason to give me meds. They want it there "just in case" - Rejection of medication for pain - I have not had a nurse that supported this at the hospital. They seem to think there is no point to skipping the epidural. - I can't refuse salve in baby's eye's or vitamin K shot due to my state's laws. - Our hospital gives mom 1 hour to bond with baby after birth and then insists on a stay in the nursery for a couple hours for bath and monitoring. I have never been successful in delaying or eliminating the bath or keeping baby for more than an hour before allowing him to go to the nursery for their routine tests. On the issue of elective inductions and c/s - I agree with the previous post that said that if you can pay out of pocket for them then I guess it is every persons choice. I think they are wrong and would never elect to have my baby before he/she was ready unless there was a serious medical issue making it safer to deliver than to allow the pregnancy to progress on its own."


Thanks ladies for all of your input! I appreciate you taking the time to respond to my questions. Maybe we'll have some ladies comment on why they DO believe in convenience c-sections and inductions, and a nice discussion will ensue. Or a debate, whatever you want to call it. I've been pondering lately, trying to figure out why I've become so passionate about natural childbirth. I haven't come up with any good reasons. Maybe because women who want one are in the minority, and I feel, often mistreated. I have always been one to pull for the underdog, and maybe this is kinda an example of that. I did find it interesting that someone pointed out that these elective procedures may not irritate others, if they were paid for out of pocket. Well, why aren't they? I think that is a great question. Any other purely elective surgery wouldn't be covered, so why is an induction or cesearean? Obviously, I am talking about PURELY elective stuff here. It is yet another thing to drive up our cost of healthcare. I know one thing for sure-- the day MY tax money helps pay for this, I will go through the roof. I wonder if (or how much) the percentage of women choosing convenience sections and inductions would go down, if they had to fork over the thousands of dollars it cost. I'm sure we'll never know, because the percentage would go down, and hospitals would lose money. Okay, enough typing for now. My fingers hurt. Ouchie.

Photos from last weekend at the lake

We went to my family's lake house last weekend, and had a wonderful time. It was just what I needed, because it reconfirmed that we are doing the right thing to move near family. Here are a few photos. This first one makes me laugh. out. loud. Seriously.

Out for a boat ride, with Drake in his babyhawk carrier. I LOVE this thing.
He was attempting to teach Gammy how to drive the jetski. He thinks he's so smart!
Swimming! In his $2 yardsale float that his Daddy found. Yes, he's in a pink flower. But it's okay, he's comfortable with his sexuality.
The serious face

My two cents

I've been informed that it's offensive that I don't believe women should just be able to choose elective C/S and elective inductions for no (medical) reason. There are many reasons I feel that way. But what it really comes down to is choice. ( Choice and jealousy, which I'll get to later.) The freedom to CHOOSE what we want. Birthing our children is one of the most monumental events in a woman's life. With it being such an important event, that will be remembered forever, it should be a happy one. One where we get options, and have choices, and don't have to FIGHT for them. If one subsection of women is going to be given choices galore, then why not respect ALL women's choices? If a woman can choose a section because she doesn't want to labor, and a woman can choose an induction at 39 weeks because she's tired of being pregnant, that is all hunky dory. But RESPECT MY CHOICES TOO.

Don't tell the woman who would rather drink than be tied to an IV, that isn't not a choice. Or that keeping the lights dim just isn't acceptable. What about mandatory monitor time? If I come in laboring, and my baby looks good on the monitor, then TAKE IT OFF. Why must it be a fight? Why would the nurse ever say to someone that refusing continuous monitoring is dangerous? It's simply not true. What is true is that our rate of fetal death and complications has not decreased AT ALL since continuous monitoring became popular. Would you like to know what has gone up? Why, the c-section rate of course. Shocker.

Women who come in willing to go with the flow, and do what the majority of women do, don't seem to have a problem. But not everyone wants an IV, epidural, and their water broken. But if women can choose that, then let women who DON'T want that also have their freedom of choice.

If a hospital offers elective/convenience sections and inductions, are they offering a full range of options to all women? Because that's what it's all about. Choices for all women. ALL, not just the ones choosing options that are making the hospital money. It's great that you offer state of the art OR's, but do you also offer birthing tubs in your rooms? Can I labor in the jacuzzi tub, can I give birth in the tub? Choices for all women, that is what I'm all about. For my next birth, I can't have a waterbirth because there aren't tubs. But yet that hospital offers convenience C-sections and inductions. What would I like to see happen? NO MORE ELECTIVE procedures until I get my waterbirth. This is where the jealousy issue comes in. I'm jealous, and pissed off because I feel like I'm treated unfairly. Why isn't my desire for a waterbirth taken as seriously, as the woman who gets induced at 39 weeks for being tired of pregnancy. When every woman, and her wishes for childbirth, get equal respect, then I will be happy.

Somehow this is kinda turning out to be a wish list for my future L&D nurse. I asked some fellow natural birth mamas what they fear/fight for in a hospital birth. I wanted some input, so this doesn't come straight from just my opinion. These are legitimate issues and "beefs" that women have. These are also women who, in general, don't "approve" of convenience inductions and sections. Maybe when we get the respect we deserve, for wanting and demanding a natural and intervention free birth, then we'll be a little more willing to respect others who have their every wish catered to.

So, to my future nurse and/or doctor:

Please be educated about alternative ways to birth naturally. Know the basic concepts of Bradley, Leboyer, Hypnobabies, Hypnobirthing, and Lamaze. When I come in wanting, and having planned for, a natural birth, I don't care to explain it in between contractions. If you know how to prep a woman for an epidural, then you should know about those programs. Fair is fair after all.

You know I want a natural birth. So, do not offer me drugs. Yes, I know they are available. Yes, I know there is a CRNA available for the almighty epidural. Do not offer me drugs. I will ask for them if I need them. Your interruption and suggestion of drugs just disrupts my focus, and is rude. Stop it.

If the lights are dim, we have them that way for a reason. Don't automatically flip all the bright lights on every time you walk in. Again, it disrupts my focus. If you need more light to read my strip, then let me know what you are doing.

I understand that you need an admission strip. I've got no problem with getting that 15 minute strip. But after that (assuming baby looks good), I will take off the monitor whether you like it or not. I'm sorry if you are too busy to intermittently and come in and check me with the doppler. Find the time. I'm a patient too, and I have choices as well. I choose to decline intermittent monitoring. Your department found time to admit the convenience induction, so please find time to respect my wishes as well.

I understand that it's easier for you and the doc/midwife if I push and deliver in stirrups. I understand, but I don't care. Not. one. iota. I choose to deliver in whatever position my body is telling me, not what is convenient for you. If I ask for a bar to hold onto while I squat to push, then get it for me. Don't waste time trying to convince me to throw my legs in stirrups.

If I'm not progressing fast enough for you, then let's look at our possibilities. Please don't tell me the number one option is pitocin. If you do, then I'll know right away that I don't like you. What about walking? Nipple stimulation? Position changes? If you are any type of caregiver that I would want anything to do with, then you will suggest these first. First and foremost.

You should have already asked about my plans for the actual delivery. Please respect the fact that I want my baby on my chest, and not across the room in the warmer. This is of course assuming baby is doing well. You can give the Vitamin K shot while he's on my chest. You can listen to his heartrate and breathing while he's on my chest. You can take his temperature while he's on my chest. Don't even think about coming in and "telling" me that you are taking my baby to the nursery. He'll be staying with me, thank.you.very.much. You've been respecting women's decisions that I don't agree with, so now it's your turn to respect my decision that you don't agree with. Fair is fair.....

Unless my baby's life is in serious peril, do not even *think* about an episiotomy. I know it's good for you to hurry up and get this delivery done; you can transfer me to postpartum and then the doc can go home. There is *no* reason for an episiotomy unless my baby is in distress, and I won't consider it. Don't bother mentioning it, and don't even think about trying to bully me into it.

Have alternative equipment available. Like a monitor that can be worn while walking, with waveforms transmitted to a monitor. It's just like cardiac telemetry. It's a nice compromise; I get to walk, and you get your monitoring. Please have plenty of birth balls. They are like 20 bucks at Target, and your department should have plenty to go around.

Bathtubs, ahhh bathtubs. I understand that most hospital rooms are equipped with showers for a reason. But the next time the L&D department gets renovated, could you please just put in jacuzzi tubs? Please? Did you know that laboring in water is considered "the midwifes epidural"? A tub may be just the thing a mommy needs to get through transition. We don't all want drugs to get through transiton; a bathtub may do the trick all by itself. I know waterbirths are a touchy subject. But seriously, read the research and get over yourself. Get the tubs, and allow waterbirths. Please?

The whole counting to ten thing----I'm so over it. My body knows when to push. I can feel things, remember? I'm not numb, and my body knows what to do. Leave us alone and quit yelling numbers in my ear. Thanks!

Okay, so enough of my hypothetical letter to my future caregivers. Yes, it's written with a snotty undertone and tongue in cheek. But I am sick and tired of people who just want a natural birth, having to fight these same battles. Yes, I am aware I don't get a medal. Yes, I am aware that it doesn't make me superwoman. But it does get me to my goal.....a drug free baby.

I was so lucky, blessed, and fortunate to have had an amazing birth with Drake. I firmly believe that not going in until I was "dying", AKA 10 cm, helped that cause. They barely had time to set up a delivery table, much less hassle me about stuff. My midwife Tina and I had talked extensively and in great detail about my wishes. She knew them up and down, and was really good about respecting them. Before I went in, I reminded the office nurse to request a nurse who was friendly towards natural childbirth. She did, and I got Marilyn, my angel nurse. She got the monitor off me as quickly as possible, and only used a doppler after that. Her and Tina got me through that last hour. But, at the same time, it could have been better. There were WAY too many people in my room. If my husband or doula had made it there in time, they could have helped with that. They could have refocused me on my hypnobabies. At least the million people in my room all seemed to have a purpose. One awesome nurse was there just to be my photographer. Tina asked me where my camera was, and the nurse found it and started snapping away. I am SO thankful for those photos, since I was by myself.

Anyhow, I think I've rambled long enough for now. Look for a continuation.....

Sharing an amazing video about homebirth

Our Journey to Homebirth

I came across this video this morning, for the second time. It made me cry, again. I have so much respect for this woman, for doing anything and everything she could to accomplish her goals. Because that's what it's all about, right---setting our goals, and then meeting them........

8 Months old!

When did my little stinker get so old? I really can't believe it! Since it's late, no pics tonight. But, really quick an update on the little man. Let's see, he sits, army crawls, rolls, scoots, babbles incessantly, and now reaches for me. He is starting to display the first signs of separation anxiety. He can get anything he wants with rolling and army crawling, and I honestly don't know that he'll ever "crawl" in the traditional sense. Especially since he's figured out how to get what he wants. His pincher grasp is perfected, but he's not interested in eating food with it. He's perfectly content with sitting in the high chair, with his mouth wide open, while someone else does all the work. He can down a jar of food like it's his job. He doesn't really care for rice or oatmeal, but we haven't found a fruit or veggie that he won't eat. He's starting to eat more food, and less bottles. Next on the list is to get him to start eating finger foods and snacks, so we can start feeding him off our plates. Is it even time for that? I have no idea..... If it is, then I welcome suggestions on how to start that! I don't know when pics from this past weekend will get up, but I'll try. We're slightly busy with the move and all:-)

SIGG bottles

So, I was as shocked as the next person when I read this earlier in the week. Shocked, and disgusted. But in some ways, I wasn't shocked. And that was the sad part. Companies will do anything to make money, include misleading their customers. I, needless to say, won't be buying any more SIGG products. Check out the below in italics, which is copied from www.inhabitots.com. There is also a great article on another blog I follow; feel free to check it out too. www.crunchydomesticgoddess.com


SIGG water bottles, which have long been perceived to be the eco-friendly alternative to plastic water bottles, has just confessed something that has sent huge ripples through the media - all of their bottles manufactured before August of last year actually DO contain BPA - according to a press statement made by Sigg CEO Steve Wasik. In case you aren’t familiar with the notorious chemical, Bisphenol A is an endocrine disruptor. Part of what made SIGG so popular in the first place was when SIGG marketing tactics involved pointing fingers at polycarbonate water bottle manufacturers - claiming that these types of bottles leached BPA. Not surprisingly, parents and eco-conscious consumers everywhere turned to SIGG bottles as a safe way to tote water on the go without being exposed to the dangerous effects of bisphenol-A, but there is a daunting sense of mistrust now that we learn we’ve been duped. Read on to see how SIGG was able to mislead us.

SIGG’s proprietary “water-based epoxy liner,” was indeed suspected of containing BPA, but representatives from the company released statements stating that the liner was never found to leach BPA in extensive tests. Reassuring to the public as that was, the whole thing was a matter of syntax. In actuality, SIGG is now admitting that their product did contain BPA, although it was never found to leach it. The tricky wording seems like it was a blatant attempt to draw our attention away from the truth, but there is no evidence of SIGG having lied - technically.

The shocking facts came to light when, one whole year after changing their liner to a new “EcoCare” BPA-free formula, SIGG fessed up. We’re happy to see that they have made an effort to rectify their mistake, but the lost trust won’t be easy to regain. Companies need to be forthcoming about what materials are in their products - especially when we are talking about children’s drinking and feeding products.

Not going to miss.....

Night shift at CMC! 20 call rooms, in close proximity, with paper thin walls. Yuck! All night long..... pagers beeping, phones ringing, doors opening and shutting. Did I mention the helicopters going up and down, all night long? The lovely smell of diesel coming through the vents? It makes it slightly difficult to sleep. I laid awake last night until 4 am! I am nervous about working five days a week and getting up early, but it can't be as bad as night shift. I'm so thankful to have had that opportunity, because it has given me more time with Drake and Eric this summer. Which is what it's all about:-) There is always a silver lining, sometimes we just have to look a little harder to find it!

I'm packing up Drake's nursery today. I've realized that I'm not necessarily so sad about leaving Charlotte, but I'm really sad to leave our house. It's our first home together, and where we brought Drake home to. His first home, and now we're leaving. I'm getting all sentimental! But, on to a new home, and new memories! I can't wait to make them......

Confessions of a CF husband

I've followed this blog/website for over a year now, and it's such a sweet story. It's written by Nate, who is married to Tricia (who has CF), and they have a little girl named Gwyneth. I love their story, and I'm continuously inspired by it. Throughout their journey, more and more people have started reading their blog. Along the way, Nate had to start moderating comments and not letting people post anonymously. I'll never quite understand why someone who doesn't even know them would feel the need to write hateful things. The easier option is simply to quit reading about them and their story.

The same thing goes for my blog. My blog was originally started to keep our distant family and friends up to date with our crazy lives. It has evolved over time, but I still enjoy blogging. It appears that I may have to eliminate people having the option to post comments anonymously. They are inevitably rude and hateful, which is just immature and ridiculous considering the other option is to QUIT READING MY BLOG.

One more night of work, and then it's time to pack some stuff up! We are still considering going out of town this weekend, but haven't decided yet. I guess we'll decide tomorrow:-)

Blog surfing

I should really quit blog surfing. If you're confused by what that means, then let me enlighten you. Basically, it's hopping to others blogs via someone's blog you actually follow/read. I do that often, just because I find blogs entertaining. For the most part. However, I've decided I need to quit randomly doing that, b/c I keep finding myself frustrated and irritated. I really need to stick to people's blog who either 1- I know, or 2- think like me.

Sometimes I'm tempted to comment, but I don't because it's not really my place. If someone is making ignorant decisions, and has people to cheer them on in their ignorance, my little comment isn't going to make a difference. And like I said, I really don't feel it's my place. Sometimes I wish I was friends with blog writers, and could actually call them up and enlighten them.

To avoid being endlessly frustrated, I've decided to stick with a few of my favorite message boards. Boards that are chock full of people who believe the same things I do, and who I can vent to. One is the natural childbirth board at justmommies.com, and another is mothering.com. They are both great sources of information, but more importantly, support. The internet really is a fabulous thing, because I only have one friend in real life who thinks like me about alot of things. Mainly pregnancy, childbirth, and parenting. Support is great, and sometimes crucial when the things I choose to believe and practice aren't mainstream. If you surf the net long enough, I guarantee you can find a group of people to support whatever your current passion or interest is.

I have two more nights of work, and I'm ready for them to be over. I'm honestly not ready to leave my job, or Charlotte, but I am ready to be done working nights. Not my thing, and these two months have reminded me of that. We move next Tuesday. I'm not sure whether to cry or try to be excited. When it comes down to it, I HAVE to try and be excited. I've got to give living in Florence a fair shot. Eric is, so I have to too. I think the summers will be easier, since it's then we'll take advantage of being close to the ocean and lake. I'm sure this first winter will be the hardest. Give me strength, because I'm sure gonna need it........