Happy Halloween!!!

It's Drake's first Halloween, and the sweet boy is sleeping right through it! Not surprising at all for our little man. We were remarking earlier how happy we are to have such a chilled out Halloween, because we know it's the last one. After this, we'll have at least one chid who understands the concept, and will be excited. I miss our old neighborhood tonight. We used to put the firepit in our front circle, and pull chairs out front. We'd sit outside and have our adult beverages, while passing out candy to all the kiddos. Our immediate neighbors would always sit out front with us, and it was such a fun time. The kids would all come around with their parents, all dragging wagons full of small children and coolers with more adult beverages. Our neighborhood really knew how to do Halloween:-)

I've been having a pity party all week of missing Charlotte. I knew going there for the weekend would make me homesick all over again. It's not that there's one particular thing there that is so amazing. It's simply that I feel more myself there, more comfortable in my own skin. I just feel more "me" there. I'm not sure I'll ever get to that point here in Florence, but it has only been just under two months. I love having my parents nearby for a multitude of reasons, and I like my job a lot. But I don't know if those two things will be enough to keep us here after my two year contract is up.

I've been back on the debt reduction bandwagon. Not that I was ever off, but I've been thinking about it more recently. Our focus right now is not exactly debt, but rather avoiding it. We desperately need a new car before Shim #2 gets here. We are more than likely buying a used Honda Pilot. It has the features I want, and is reasonable priced. My plan is to not spend over 20K. We REALLY don't want a car loan. So, we are saving!!! We're almost to the $7000 mark, and I'm so proud of us. I'd love to take that money and head on some tropical vacation like we normally do. But since Dave Ramsey and my "education", my mindset is different. Having children changes that as well. I want to work part time, between 24-30 hours a week. But until our debt is gone, that won't be an option.

2 of our 5 large debt items are gone. First was our credit cards back in Aoril, and second is my school loan/scholarship from the hospital I now work for. Coming back here to work has huge financial advantages! In just those two things alone, we've eliminated almost $50,000 in debt. Go us!!! After we purchase our new to us car, the next thing on my agenda is my official grad school loan. It's the big one from the federal goverment, and I can't wait to start paying on it! My goal is to start on that by next May. We don't know what our tax situation will look like next year, and we may have to pay. That may change our plan significantly.

We are still (im)patiently waiting for our house to sell in Charlotte. The market is just sucking right now, so we are optimistic for spring. I really hope it sells in the spring. That will eliminate large debt item number three- our home equity line. We have talked lately about doing something completely radical, from my usual viewpoint. We have talked about taking the profit from selling our house, and outright paying off our federal student loans. That would take us to being completely debt free!!! That is such crazy concept for me. But thanks to Dave (Ramsey), I realize that is actually how we should be living our lives. We would continue to rent, and our rent is super duper cheap. Really cheap rent, combined with no debt, means alot of money coming into this house each month. Which means we then save like responsible adults, for a house down payment. It's just an idea we've toyed around with. I don't know if we'll actually do it when we get to that point, but it's a viable option to consider.

I never thought I'd be considering such ideas. Thanks Dave for opening my eyes to how freeing it is to have no debt.

Lovin it!

I'm already loving having my blog private. The only bad thing is having to take the time to add all these email addresses people are sending me. I've discovered some people that follow my blog, that I didn't know about. I'm not adding everyone that sends a request. Why? Because I don't think everyone who wants to read has good intentions. Because I believe that some who want to continue to read, may have been the ones being rude in previous comments. And if this blog is so offensive, I see no reason why someone who feels that way would want to continue to read. Example: the chick who thought my blog was "like a train wreck she just couldn't look away from". Uhhh, it's easy actually. Just don't visit the website. Especially if our ideas on parenting are EXTREMELY different, and you know you will end up pissed off.
Of course I think my parenting values and ideals are better. If there was another way that I thought was better, then I'd be using that way. It seems so logical to me, but not to others. People have written, all pissed off, that I think my ways are better. OF COURSE I DO!!! If I didn't think it was better than all the other ways out there, then why the hell would I be doing it?

We took Drake to a Halloween carnival this evening, for just a short bit. It was past his bedtime, so he was tired. But being the sweet boy he is, he was a trooper. He still smiled and giggled at people, despite being beyond ready for bed. We don't believe it's a smart thing for us to put our children on a strict schedule. Before we had children, we discussed and agreed that our children would fit into our lives, rather than us fitting into theirs. It's worked for the last nine months, and we hope it continues. Drake is very flexible, and for that we are thankful.

I'm in complete shock and awe that I'm almost 17 weeks pregnant. I think I'll have a bit of a freak out moment at 20 weeks- the big half way mark! It's time for me to start getting serious with my hypnobabies material again. It is so relaxing and soothing. I love the mantra: "Pregnancy is normal, natural, healthy, and safe." I love those four words. Soothing is the best way to describe how those four words make me feel. I love falling asleep listening to those tracks on my ipod.

I'm so excited that we are able to go to Buffalo for Thanksgiving. Working in healthcare makes holidays difficult, because the hospital is never closed. It's a rare thing that I'll be able to have an entire week off at the holidays. I'm so excited about having the whole week this year, and we are happy to see all of Drake's cousins. I can't wait for Drake to get to play with his cousins again! Especially now that he is so mobile and into everything. And it's so nice to be able to spend time with Eric's family. I have the best inlaws! Especially my MIL and SIL's. I love the men too, but the women in Eric's family are truly awesome. I feel sorry for people with crappy inlaws. I feel even worse for people who are too stupid to realize when they have great inlaws. But, those are the type people that are never happy. If they aren't ticked off or having drama over something, then they just aren't fulfilled. How sad that existence must be.

The hospital I "should" deliver at has a C-section rate of 37%. I'm horrified and disgusted. But I don't know that the other hospital is any better. I'm still unsure about a homebirth. I'm not sure when I'll make a decision, but I feel like I should make one sooner rather than later. I need to go buy a printer tomorrow, so I can print out my letter to hospital administration. The response I get to that, or the lack of response, will help shape my decision. I wish I had a crystal ball......

Privacy

I've decided that it's time for this blog to be private. Comments are enabled, so feel free to comment away! I love getting comments from people who won't be leaving rude ones. And since I'm being very selective about who I invite to read this, I don't anticipate it being a problem.

I've also started a second blog. It contains more about my job, and my passions for pregnancy/childbirth. It's written anonymously, meaning without my name or any photos that are identifying. It contains a lot more of my very opinionated opinions, and it's a place where I feel I can be more blunt. And a place where I feel like I can do more venting. I want to keep my original blog to mostly talk about my family and kiddos.

If you want the name of the other blog, I can email it to you. But I will warn you in advance, I'm being very selfish about handing it out. If you know you feel the same as me about the issues I'm passionate about, then you might enjoy reading it. Let me know!

Charlotte Fun

Last weekend, we went to the Panthers vs Bills game for Eric's birthday. It was such a fun weekend. We got to stay with our close friends Jill and Tony, and go to dinner Saturday night with a big group of our friends. Can't wait to go back to Charlotte! Here are pics from the game.

Oh yeah baby, that is a BUFFALO wing on that guys head. That may have been the coolest hat ever.

We parked near our old neighborhood, and took the train uptown. It was packed, which is very normal for a game day. I love taking the train. You can see the skyline in the distance. Those strange orange things are "art" that taxpayers money paid for. Evidence that the politicians in Charlotte aren't very smart either.
The Bills side, right before the game got started.
We figured out why our seats were cheap. You see that concrete behind us? Yep, you guessed it. We were on the VERY top row. We were also in the visitors section, but that worked out *lovely* since we were there to cheer for the visiting team.
The three minutes of sunshine the entire day. I love the Charlotte skyline. Even if we don't ever move back, that city will always have such a special place in my heart!!!
This as we were walking down the ramp, leaving the stadium. The sky was hot pink and gorgeous.

Fun at the Fair

Last week the fair was in town in Florence. I really wanted to take Drake. He was WIDE awake and totally into all the sights and sounds. He didn't want to miss a thing. My parents decided to come to, and bring McCall. The cousins had a large time!

Riding the merry go round with Grandma. This turned out to be the only ride he could go on, so we rode it four times:-)

This may be the funniest progression of pictures ever. First, is Drake thinking about waking up McCall.
Next, he makes a go for it.
Almost has her!!!!!! Check out the looks on the grandparents faces.
They managed to reel him back in, keep McCall asleep, and get a cute photo.

Riding the Merry go Round with Grandma. And no, we didn't leave poor McCall out to be mean. One, she was sleeping soundly. But more importantly, she wasn't allowed on rides per her parents instructions. She's still a bit young!

Sweet sleeping angel!
Riding with my big boy. I think he enjoyed it, but he seemed more perplexed than anything.
He was a happy boy to be at the fair.
The grandparents in all their glory.

Shim #2!!!

Last Saturday, Eric and I (and Drake of course) went to the Prenatal Picture in Charlotte. For starters, this is a wonderful facility. Clean, cute, and with a really nice sonographer. I was only 15 weeks and 4 days, so it was early for a gender scan, and really early for a 3d/4d scan. But alas, we went anyways, because it was the only time we had to go to Charlotte. My scan isn't until 19 weeks at the OB's office, due to my work schedule. And I just didn't want to wait that long:-)

I was very torn about what Shim was. My gut said boy, but I kept thinking of girls names. I just couldn't get girls names out of my head. So I was really unsure going into it.

For the first five minutes, Shim #2 wouldn't show us the goods. After some coaxing and jiggling of my tummy, those legs finally spread. BOY!!! There was no doubt about it. My initial reaction was, "Yay, Drake will get to have a brother to be close to." Eric and his brother are about 18 months apart, and I see what a special bond that is. I'm so happy that Drake will have that too.

Without further adieu, we proudly introduce the newest addition to our growing family. We can't wait to meet you little guy!

Covering his ears already. I guess Drake was too loud?

No doubt about it, that's a penis!!!
Talk to the hand...
Again, talk to the hand...
I think he was trying to tell us something ;-)

Drake update

Before I head to work, just wanted to say Drake got a great report at his "nine" month visit. Even though he is almost 9 and a half months. He is hitting his milestones appropriately, and physically very healthy. He is small as always. Drake is up to a whopping 16 pounds and 4 oz, and 26 inches long. That puts him in the 5th percentile for weight and 10th for height. I wish he was a fat chunker, but I'm learning to accept that we've got a little guy. I'm happy he's on the chart, because he certainly wasn't when he was born!

At least I'm not going to have to worry about him being obese. Seeing obese children has always bothered me, but I guess that won't be an issue with our Drakey. We are going to start adding more meat and avocado to his diet, for the protein and healthy fat.

Request

No time to write more right now, but for all of you religious/spiritual peeps out there, please say a prayer for the Victoria Martinsen family. I will tell you all about their family later. In a nutshell, they have had to call hospice in to help care for their young daughter. I've known them for years, since Victoria's first hospital admission. They are such a special family, and really would love prayers of peace and acceptance. And most of all, comfort for Victoria, that the pain would subside.

I gave up

I gave up on the pediatricians office. I have been trying for AN ENTIRE MONTH to schedule Drake an appointment, and help them get the records. I'm thinking that if they are incapable of getting this done in a months time, then I probably can't count on them if I truly needed them.

In happy news, I have Drake an appointment next week (gasp) with a family doctor that was highly recommended by coworkers. She has young children of her own, and is originally from Argentina. I like that fact that she grew up somewhere else. She's probably more open minded about extended breastfeeding, non circing, and selectively vaxing, than say a pediatrician born and raised in SC. I like for my family's care providers to be open minded, because we certainly don't just follow the crowd.

I'm really happy Drake finally gets his well baby nine month checkup. And he needs to get back on track with his vaccines. More than anything, I just really want him to have a doctor that we can call when he does get sick. As much as I love Dr. Rogers at Doctors Care urgent care center, that gets expensive. Anyways, I just wanted to share our good news of the day!

Sunday Funday

Sunday's are fun because we usually get to relax. What a wonderful thing compared to being on the go all week long. Eric took me out to dinner last night, and we found a restaurant we really liked. That alone made me happy! I had a great birthday, although I can't believe I'm 31. Eric will be 33 on Tuesday- he's really getting old!

It's back to the grindstone this week. Week number 1 of 5, until I'm off for another week. Every 6th week off is a truly glorious thing! This weeks agenda includes taking Drake to the fair on Thursday. Eric is working about 80 hours a week now, trying to build up the sleep lab he's working for. He, needless to say, won't be going with us. I'm trying to talk my parents into going. I really think Drake would enjoy seeing all of the sights.

We are going to Buffalo for my next week off, which happens to fall at Thanksgiving. We are thrilled to be able to spend the holidays with Eric's family, because the timing for that rarely works out. I am very nervous about taking Drake on an airplane in November though. Lots of germs unfortunately.

I am obsessively planning our trip to Disney. I must have something to plan at all times. For now, it's Disney World. We'll be going with a 5 month old and 20 month old. It may seem insane to some, but it works for us. I have to go to a continuing education conference once a year, and I get a stipend from work to do that. So, it might as well be at Disney. I'm really excited! Drake is going to love it, and the new baby will just love a week of snuggle time with Mommy and Daddy.

Reason number 247 to cloth diaper: Drake's butt is very fluffy when he falls. And since he does NOTHING but pull up, stand, and cruise around holding on to furniture, this is a good thing.

It's night-night time around here, so I must get to it!

DUH!

I am 31 tomorrow, not 32 like I had originally posted. Thanks Mom for pointing that out. Motherhood is KILLING my brain.

Random thoughts

My sweet boy was a such a little trooper at his nine month photos today! I couldn't believe how many times we managed to get him in a different outfit or look. Because of me having to work 5 days a week, it's gonna be about 3 weeks before I can get back to view them. I don't even want to think about how much money I'm going to spend. Shhh, don't tell my husband.

In other photo news, I've been thinking about having our next birth documented. I first heard about it in Charlotte, as there was a photographer there who had just started doing it. It is more common amongst natural birthing moms and home birthing moms. I'm not really sure why that is. There is certainly more to photograph for them. I mean, there are only so many shots you can get of a mom in bed with an epidural, and attached to an IV. I wonder if that's why NCB moms choose to have birth documentation/photos more often than other moms. So, I've been thinking about this, and an opportunity has presented itself at the perfect time.

The photographer we are using in Florence for our family's portraits has a blog on his website. Check out www.cmsmithportraits.com. His wife writes the blog, and recently wrote about possibly starting "lifestyle photography" as a division of their studio. Birth photography and documentation is part of that, and I was beyond thrilled to read about that. I really had not anticipated finding someone in Florence for that type of work. And get this---she's had TWO natural childbirths! So not only could she shoot our birth day, she could also be an advocate and supporter.

Drake is super tired this afternoon, and it took FOREVER to get him asleep. He's currently tied to my chest in the Moby. It was the only way he'd finally fall asleep. We tried everything else known to man.

I love having these two days off, and having so much snuggle time with my sweet boy. There truly isn't anything like it.

A Work In Progress

I've started my letter to my hospital's administrative staff, and it is amazingly politically correct. For someone who is more blunt than eloquent, I've really been pulling some surprising words and phrases out of my ass. I want to clarify that the hospital issues are really what's driving me towards wanting a homebirth. While I don't like my OB's office staff, or her one particular partner, I really do love my OB. She took so much time to listen to and discuss my concerns at my visit with her, and I'm really grateful for that. I'm gonna see if she'll take cash under the table to come to my birth, even if she's not on call;-)

There is a really fun (and yet disturbing) website at www.myobsaidwhat.com. It's a compilation of ridiculous things said by not just OB's, but also midwives, nurses, lactation consultants, doulas, and even some fellow anesthesia peeps. You can check it out if you want to be amused. I'm going to send in a statement from my last visit. The OB who I wasn't very fond of said (in response to my birth plan), "Well, you aren't opposed to having your water broken are you- THAT's natural". Ummmmm- no it's not. Please tell me what part of having a plastic hook inserted into my vagina, through my cervix, and then ripping a hole in my baby's protective amniotic sac IS NATURAL!!! Ummmmmm, no, it's not natural. So, I think I may send that comment in, because it's beginning to amuse me the more I think about it.

In Drake news, his separation anxiety has hit an all new high. I walked out of his nursery tonight to put a load of diapers in, and he completely lost it. I mean, bawled uncontrollably. And he wouldn't calm down until I sat down, and held him in my lap. Someone has his mommy wrapped around his chubby little fingers. I'm taking him for his nine month photos tomorrow, and I'm excited! In other exciting news, we are finally close to getting a pediatrician appointment. I raised hell today at the office in Charlotte, and they actually faxed the records since they failed to mail them last week. The nicest girl helped me (over the phone) and was very apologetic after I had demanded to speak with the office manager. Fast forward to the next conversation, with the Florence office. After three weeks of them refusing to make an appt with this certain pediatrician, without records, they just now today inform me there isn't an appt available for 2 months with the guy I requested. I said I'd be thrilled to see ANY doctor, and even happier to see the nurse practitioner. I also just had to tell them that for an office so 'concerned' with fully vaccinating their patients, they certainly didn't seem to be very concerned with getting my son in, especially when he's due for a vaccine. After that, she informed me they do have a doctor newer to the practice, who they could get Drake in with quickly. I figured that mentioning he needed a vaccine would do the trick:-)

I'll be 32 whole years old on Friday, and my massage is already scheduled!!! I'm also shopping, and getting a mani/pedi. All alone!!! I can't wait for some Nikki time. I told my parents that the only thing I wanted for my birthday was for them to watch Drake for the afternoon! Well, I've gotta get back to my letter writing. I hope to get it mailed next week.

Until next time.....

It's time...

It's either time for action, or time for a change of plans. I had the chance today to speak with the nurse manager of the L&D floor where I work. This is (obviously) where I'll be delivering our next addition. To make a long story short, I wasn't happy with her answers to my questions. Their lack of proper equipment for a natural birthing mom was disturbing. Their policies regarding visitors are deplorable. I was not impressed, to say the least. Combine that with my general level of unhappiness and dissatisfaction with the OB's office, and now I'm thinking about a change of plans.

You guessed it, I'm finally considering a midwife attended homebirth. Eric and I still have to get some questions answered by the midwife, mostly regarding what emergency equipment and supplies she travels with. I'm hoping to meet her and love her, and have the decision be an easy one.

At the same time, I'd also like to try and implement change within my employers L&D services. Some of their policies do not match the other hospital in town, and they are going to have to change those in order to stay competitive. Quite a bit of their routine doesn't follow current research; it's not evidence based practice. I intend to point that out, but doubt anything will come of it. At least I know it would in MY birth, because I'd demand it. I'm drafting a letter to send to the hospital CEO, and any other administrators involved in the L&D unit of Women's Services. Who knows if anyone will even read the letters, or much less care to do anything about it. But it will make me feel better to at least write them. Maybe they will actually take a look at their routine and policy, and other Moms will benefit. That would be beyond amazing.

I can say, for sure, 100% without doubt, that they will not get my business unless they at least amend the visiting policy for me. The other hospital in town will cost me more, since they aren't a "preferred provider" in my insurance network, but I'd consider them if my pregnancy became high risk.

Patients often assume they don't really have choices. They are told what's best for them, and what the hospital policy is, and they just go along with it. I hope just one person reads this and realizes, you DO have choices. Research, and empower yourself. Demand what you know is best for you and your family!!!

Photo Dump

My friend Adriann got married at the end of September. Congrats to her and Judd! This is me and my sweetie, before the wedding.

Drake laughing as he tries to eat a leaf. His Halloween outfit is one of his Grandma Brenda's creations.
This is what happens when I ask my husband to feed Drake lunch, on a Sunday afternoon. That's right folks, the highchair was pulled into the living room so they could watch the Panthers.
My evening routine (unless I'm one of the late CRNA's that day), is to give Drake dinner about 5:30, then a bath, and finally pajamas and a bottle. He's usually asleep in his crib between 6:30 and 7:30.
I don't know why this picture insisted on flipping back this way, but it's really cute. My boys love to nap together!
This was from our first weekend in Florence. We took Drake to the park to explore a little. He loved the swings!

The Pumpkin Patch

I sure love this stinker!

We could not in a million years have planned for this photo. Eric was just snapping away, and Drake chose that exact moment to puke. We both thought it to be hilarious, although this photo will probably make my Dad gag.

He wasn't feeling the pumpkin patch.
See the Bills gear? Drake's a true fan, even though his dad is a little frustrated with the season thus far.
He's happy as long as he can pull up and stand! He hates to sit now.
His confused face.

Oh the decisions....

One of the pediatricians in the practice I will (hopefully) take Drake to is recommending his patients NOT get the H1N1 vaccine. This is according to a nurse I work with who's child sees him. I'm astonished. I'm so torn over whether or not to do all FOUR vaccines for the flu this year. Because of Drake's age, he needs two doses of each vaccine in order for them to be completely effective. And if that comes from a multi dose vial, that's FOUR doses of mercury. I wonder if parents realize that studies about such large amounts of mercury being given in such close proximity have never been done. There are no studies to provide info on how safe this is or isn't.

Because of how serious the regular and H1N1 flu both seem to be, I am leaning toward having him vaccinated. However, not more than one at a time, and only vaccines with no mercury. I really hope the peds offices around here get the vaccines that are single dose. But that's assuming I can even get my records there, and obtain an appointment. We may end up at DHEC for vaccines before it's all over.

I wish I was 100% sure of my decisions for Drake. Being torn about what to do isn't easy. I just want what's best for him, and unfortunately the research just isn't clear.

On a random note, I find it ridiculous, all the people on facebook who are announcing their child has swine flu, without a swab ever being done. How about being factual, and saying that you "think" your child has swine flu. Otherwise, it's just contributing to the mass hysteria.

On another random note, to address those who accuse me of being a hypocrite to give drugs all day, and then not fully vaccinate my family according to AAP schedule. All that's left to say there, is "Screw you". There is quite a bit of difference between giving a drug for a therapeutic effect, and giving a vaccine to prevent a disease.

I had an interesting case today, with an interesting drug reaction that none of us had ever seen. Interesting for sure, but I could have done without it. I'm past the point in my life where I like that kind of excitement. Normal and stable is just how I like it these days. Boring anesthesia is the best!!! The group of MDA's I work with are awesome!

I just wanted to throw some positives out there, because I often blog when irritated or frustrated. I should probably try to minimize that, because I've realized it can give my blog a negative vibe. Another positive for today is that my sweet husband did laundry and cleaned the kitchen! We also have our tickets to fly to Buffalo for Thanksgiving, and our football tickets to the Panthers vs. Bills game October 25 in Charlotte. Lots of exciting planning going on around here. I'm excited about going to the game, because one of our teams will finally win!!!! Ha ha, that's pretty sad.

Well, it's late and I'm off to bed. An early day awaits me in the morning!

Happy and Sad

Happy 9 month birthday to my sweet baby boy! He is such an amazing joy in our lives! He is everywhere, and into everything. He can crawl/scoot all over, and now pulls up on everything in sight. He will take a few steps behind his cruiser toy, but is a little timid. He's more comfortable taking steps around our ottoman, since it doesn't move. I promise I have photos coming, but I'm just too tired to download them tonight.

On another note, my poor baby got diagnosed with an ear infection for his nine month birthday. He's been pulling at his right ear, but hasn't had a fever at all. But, he has slept HORRIBLY the past two nights. Mommy's intuition told me he needed to be seen. So, off we go to the "Doctors Care" urgent care center, and the awesome Dr. Rogers. Interestingly enough, he did have an ear infection, but not in the ear he's been pulling at. And while they didn't do a strep swab, he said his eyes and throat were red in the way that suggested strept. Just great- I gave my bambino strept and my ear infection. I feel like the shittiest mom on earth right now. There is comfort in knowing I did get on antibiotics as soon as possible, despite my OB's office being CONVINCED I had the piggy flu. Drake honestly acts like he feels fine, other than the sleep issue. That makes me happy! He'll start on his own Amoxicillin tonight, and that makes me sad. I feel like if I was still breastfeeding, he wouldn't have gotten this. Why can't I be one of those lucky women who has an endless supply of breast milk???

On another not so happy note, I am so disappointed and frustrated with my obstetrical care here. I miss my midwives and that office staff more than words can possibly describe. The front office chick at my OB's office is a raging bitch. In turn, she makes this pregnant and tired mommy have the almost uncontrollable urge to slap the shit out of her. If I get arrested soon, you'll all know why. In my checkup today, (not with my main OB), I took the time to go over the principles of my birth plan. And just what did the OB do while I was 'attempting' to discuss this with her? Well, for starters, she hardly looked me in the eye. She stood near the door, like she was just trying to get out. And the kicker? She DOODLED on my checkout sheet. I thought that's what was going on, and on my way to the checkout counter, I confirmed it. And her answer to everything I had a question about? "Well, that's an issue with the hospital, not us." NEWS FLASH LADY::: I am your patient, therefore it's your issue too. Even if you don't give two shits about me, my birth plan, or what my wishes are, you could pretend!!! I was so pissed when I left there, I stopped in at another OB's office in the same building to get some info about their practice. Unfortunately, I wasn't impressed.

I'm so flippin homesick for Charlotte, my midwives, and Drake's pediatrician that it's not even funny. I've been trying for weeks to get Drake a pediatrician's appointment. He needs his nine month well baby visit. Plus, some vaccines. I've gone as far as physically going to their office, to no avail. For some reason, they just can't manage to fax out the request for his records from Charlotte. I had Eric go to the office in Charlotte last week to sign the papers to have them mailed. They won't make an appointment until they receive the records, and have the ped review them. Then the pediatrician has to "accept" Drake. And I don't even know if they will, since he isn't vaccinated according to the almighty AAP schedule. Then, I'll have to start from scratch to get him in at the other office in town. Which of course will cost me more, since it isn't part of the hospital I work for.

So, that's what's going on here. We are super busy, and I'm super stressed. With a sick baby. Relocating surely isn't easy. I hope all these issues with our healthcare providers will soon be straightened out. I expected a few kinks, but I didn't think it would all be so difficult.

Guess who is going to be a BIG BROTHER?

You guessed it!!! DRAKE!!!!!

We are expecting the next addition to the Kirsch family in mid April, and we are so excited! We had talked about our future family while we were dating, and have always known we want our children close in age. Drake and the newest addition will be 15 months apart. We know it's going to be very hard, but we wouldn't have it any other way. We want them close, and I'm also ready to get past my "childbearing years". I told Eric he can get two kids out of me, and then it's on to adoption! Ever since I was a teenager, I have had a nagging feeling that I wanted to adopt a child one day. I'm not sure if we'll actually go on that journey, but it's an option for the future. And I may just not feel finished after number two, and feel led to have another biological child. We have no clear cut plan, other than knowing we want our children close in age. We are so blessed with another pregnancy, and so thankful. The morning sickness is almost gone, and I'm not nearly as tired as I thought I'd be. I'll be 13 weeks this Tuesday-- so long to the first trimester! I can't say I'm sad to see it go. The second trimester is truly fabulous. My appointments have all been fine so far.

My first two appts were with my midwife Tina, in Charlotte. I have to admit that I got in my car and cried after that last appointment. I really miss her, and that entire office staff. I felt truly cared for there, physically and emotionally. There are no midwives in Florence, so I now see an OB group. I asked around, and a nurse on L&D here recommended one she thought I would mesh with. I did like the OB, despite all of my reservations. I tried to go in with an open mind, and I was pleased. She took the time to sit down with me and answer about 20 questions. While I liked her personally, and how candid she was, she wasn't all full of good news. She flat out told me that I am going to have a really hard time having my wishes respected, and getting the type birth I want, in the hospital I'll be delivering at. But never fear, I've already got that issue covered.

I've found a group of doulas in Myrtle Beach who have accepted me as a client, and are more than happy to drive to Florence. Plus, they are familiar with hypnobirthing/hypnobabies. In addition, I plan for Eric to be at this birth. I plan to realize in my next labor, that those crampy feelings are called contractions. And I'll let him know in plenty of time! In addition, my cousin Ashlee (who is more like a sister), has also agreed to be there for me and be an advocate. She can be very verbal, which is what I'll need while I'm working through contractions. She may also find a more polite way to tell the nurses to eff off. I'm not sure I'll be so polite while laboring. So, between these three people, I WILL get the type of birth I want, despite having a hospital and nursing staff who very rarely see natural birth.

There are about 6-7 weeks until my anatomy scan at the doctors office, but I plan to have an early gender scan in 3 weeks, up in Charlotte. We are going up for the Bills/Panthers game, and will fit in an ultrasound that Saturday. I'm excited! I don't have any strong feelings about the sex of this little one. This is quite different from Drake, who I just knew was a boy. I'd really like to have another boy, so Drake can have a brother. Eric and his brother are close in age, and are still close friends today. I really want that for Drake. On the other hand, I'd really like to have a girl as well, to dress up with, and be Mommy's best girlfriend. There is a perfect plan for our family, but we don't have any input in it. We trust that it is indeed perfect, and we can't wait to see what that entails!

H1N1 vaccine..... (again)

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/2205843/h1n1_flumist_the_nasal_spray_that_keeps.html?cat=70

So, here is the long and short of it. The H1N1 vaccine that comes in the nose spray is called Flumist. It is a LIVE virus, unlike the shots. You literally become a carrier of H1N1 if you choose this method of the vaccine. It "sheds" for up to 21 days, which means that as you move around society, you are spreading the virus. It's a very low rate of transmission, and I've read anywhere from 0.5-3%. Since this is a brand new thing, I don't believe anyone knows for sure.

What does this mean to our family? Well, obviously we won't be getting the Flumist, if we choose to be vaccinated. It also means, that if you get the Flumist version, DO NOT COME NEAR MY FAMILY. ESPECIALLY MY CHILD! No ands, ifs, or buts about it. Please stay away for at least 3 weeks after you are vaccinated. Thanks!!!

We've been super busy lately, with my new job, and Eric's parents in town. It's been a great week, and we are sad to see them leave in the morning. I hope to make it to Merry Marketplace tomorrow, and we want to take Drake to the pumpkin patch. I hope the weather is nice this weekend! Stay tuned for some more blog posts coming up. I have one with some big news, and one all about car seats.