Oh the decisions....

One of the pediatricians in the practice I will (hopefully) take Drake to is recommending his patients NOT get the H1N1 vaccine. This is according to a nurse I work with who's child sees him. I'm astonished. I'm so torn over whether or not to do all FOUR vaccines for the flu this year. Because of Drake's age, he needs two doses of each vaccine in order for them to be completely effective. And if that comes from a multi dose vial, that's FOUR doses of mercury. I wonder if parents realize that studies about such large amounts of mercury being given in such close proximity have never been done. There are no studies to provide info on how safe this is or isn't.

Because of how serious the regular and H1N1 flu both seem to be, I am leaning toward having him vaccinated. However, not more than one at a time, and only vaccines with no mercury. I really hope the peds offices around here get the vaccines that are single dose. But that's assuming I can even get my records there, and obtain an appointment. We may end up at DHEC for vaccines before it's all over.

I wish I was 100% sure of my decisions for Drake. Being torn about what to do isn't easy. I just want what's best for him, and unfortunately the research just isn't clear.

On a random note, I find it ridiculous, all the people on facebook who are announcing their child has swine flu, without a swab ever being done. How about being factual, and saying that you "think" your child has swine flu. Otherwise, it's just contributing to the mass hysteria.

On another random note, to address those who accuse me of being a hypocrite to give drugs all day, and then not fully vaccinate my family according to AAP schedule. All that's left to say there, is "Screw you". There is quite a bit of difference between giving a drug for a therapeutic effect, and giving a vaccine to prevent a disease.

I had an interesting case today, with an interesting drug reaction that none of us had ever seen. Interesting for sure, but I could have done without it. I'm past the point in my life where I like that kind of excitement. Normal and stable is just how I like it these days. Boring anesthesia is the best!!! The group of MDA's I work with are awesome!

I just wanted to throw some positives out there, because I often blog when irritated or frustrated. I should probably try to minimize that, because I've realized it can give my blog a negative vibe. Another positive for today is that my sweet husband did laundry and cleaned the kitchen! We also have our tickets to fly to Buffalo for Thanksgiving, and our football tickets to the Panthers vs. Bills game October 25 in Charlotte. Lots of exciting planning going on around here. I'm excited about going to the game, because one of our teams will finally win!!!! Ha ha, that's pretty sad.

Well, it's late and I'm off to bed. An early day awaits me in the morning!

Happy and Sad

Happy 9 month birthday to my sweet baby boy! He is such an amazing joy in our lives! He is everywhere, and into everything. He can crawl/scoot all over, and now pulls up on everything in sight. He will take a few steps behind his cruiser toy, but is a little timid. He's more comfortable taking steps around our ottoman, since it doesn't move. I promise I have photos coming, but I'm just too tired to download them tonight.

On another note, my poor baby got diagnosed with an ear infection for his nine month birthday. He's been pulling at his right ear, but hasn't had a fever at all. But, he has slept HORRIBLY the past two nights. Mommy's intuition told me he needed to be seen. So, off we go to the "Doctors Care" urgent care center, and the awesome Dr. Rogers. Interestingly enough, he did have an ear infection, but not in the ear he's been pulling at. And while they didn't do a strep swab, he said his eyes and throat were red in the way that suggested strept. Just great- I gave my bambino strept and my ear infection. I feel like the shittiest mom on earth right now. There is comfort in knowing I did get on antibiotics as soon as possible, despite my OB's office being CONVINCED I had the piggy flu. Drake honestly acts like he feels fine, other than the sleep issue. That makes me happy! He'll start on his own Amoxicillin tonight, and that makes me sad. I feel like if I was still breastfeeding, he wouldn't have gotten this. Why can't I be one of those lucky women who has an endless supply of breast milk???

On another not so happy note, I am so disappointed and frustrated with my obstetrical care here. I miss my midwives and that office staff more than words can possibly describe. The front office chick at my OB's office is a raging bitch. In turn, she makes this pregnant and tired mommy have the almost uncontrollable urge to slap the shit out of her. If I get arrested soon, you'll all know why. In my checkup today, (not with my main OB), I took the time to go over the principles of my birth plan. And just what did the OB do while I was 'attempting' to discuss this with her? Well, for starters, she hardly looked me in the eye. She stood near the door, like she was just trying to get out. And the kicker? She DOODLED on my checkout sheet. I thought that's what was going on, and on my way to the checkout counter, I confirmed it. And her answer to everything I had a question about? "Well, that's an issue with the hospital, not us." NEWS FLASH LADY::: I am your patient, therefore it's your issue too. Even if you don't give two shits about me, my birth plan, or what my wishes are, you could pretend!!! I was so pissed when I left there, I stopped in at another OB's office in the same building to get some info about their practice. Unfortunately, I wasn't impressed.

I'm so flippin homesick for Charlotte, my midwives, and Drake's pediatrician that it's not even funny. I've been trying for weeks to get Drake a pediatrician's appointment. He needs his nine month well baby visit. Plus, some vaccines. I've gone as far as physically going to their office, to no avail. For some reason, they just can't manage to fax out the request for his records from Charlotte. I had Eric go to the office in Charlotte last week to sign the papers to have them mailed. They won't make an appointment until they receive the records, and have the ped review them. Then the pediatrician has to "accept" Drake. And I don't even know if they will, since he isn't vaccinated according to the almighty AAP schedule. Then, I'll have to start from scratch to get him in at the other office in town. Which of course will cost me more, since it isn't part of the hospital I work for.

So, that's what's going on here. We are super busy, and I'm super stressed. With a sick baby. Relocating surely isn't easy. I hope all these issues with our healthcare providers will soon be straightened out. I expected a few kinks, but I didn't think it would all be so difficult.

Guess who is going to be a BIG BROTHER?

You guessed it!!! DRAKE!!!!!

We are expecting the next addition to the Kirsch family in mid April, and we are so excited! We had talked about our future family while we were dating, and have always known we want our children close in age. Drake and the newest addition will be 15 months apart. We know it's going to be very hard, but we wouldn't have it any other way. We want them close, and I'm also ready to get past my "childbearing years". I told Eric he can get two kids out of me, and then it's on to adoption! Ever since I was a teenager, I have had a nagging feeling that I wanted to adopt a child one day. I'm not sure if we'll actually go on that journey, but it's an option for the future. And I may just not feel finished after number two, and feel led to have another biological child. We have no clear cut plan, other than knowing we want our children close in age. We are so blessed with another pregnancy, and so thankful. The morning sickness is almost gone, and I'm not nearly as tired as I thought I'd be. I'll be 13 weeks this Tuesday-- so long to the first trimester! I can't say I'm sad to see it go. The second trimester is truly fabulous. My appointments have all been fine so far.

My first two appts were with my midwife Tina, in Charlotte. I have to admit that I got in my car and cried after that last appointment. I really miss her, and that entire office staff. I felt truly cared for there, physically and emotionally. There are no midwives in Florence, so I now see an OB group. I asked around, and a nurse on L&D here recommended one she thought I would mesh with. I did like the OB, despite all of my reservations. I tried to go in with an open mind, and I was pleased. She took the time to sit down with me and answer about 20 questions. While I liked her personally, and how candid she was, she wasn't all full of good news. She flat out told me that I am going to have a really hard time having my wishes respected, and getting the type birth I want, in the hospital I'll be delivering at. But never fear, I've already got that issue covered.

I've found a group of doulas in Myrtle Beach who have accepted me as a client, and are more than happy to drive to Florence. Plus, they are familiar with hypnobirthing/hypnobabies. In addition, I plan for Eric to be at this birth. I plan to realize in my next labor, that those crampy feelings are called contractions. And I'll let him know in plenty of time! In addition, my cousin Ashlee (who is more like a sister), has also agreed to be there for me and be an advocate. She can be very verbal, which is what I'll need while I'm working through contractions. She may also find a more polite way to tell the nurses to eff off. I'm not sure I'll be so polite while laboring. So, between these three people, I WILL get the type of birth I want, despite having a hospital and nursing staff who very rarely see natural birth.

There are about 6-7 weeks until my anatomy scan at the doctors office, but I plan to have an early gender scan in 3 weeks, up in Charlotte. We are going up for the Bills/Panthers game, and will fit in an ultrasound that Saturday. I'm excited! I don't have any strong feelings about the sex of this little one. This is quite different from Drake, who I just knew was a boy. I'd really like to have another boy, so Drake can have a brother. Eric and his brother are close in age, and are still close friends today. I really want that for Drake. On the other hand, I'd really like to have a girl as well, to dress up with, and be Mommy's best girlfriend. There is a perfect plan for our family, but we don't have any input in it. We trust that it is indeed perfect, and we can't wait to see what that entails!

H1N1 vaccine..... (again)

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/2205843/h1n1_flumist_the_nasal_spray_that_keeps.html?cat=70

So, here is the long and short of it. The H1N1 vaccine that comes in the nose spray is called Flumist. It is a LIVE virus, unlike the shots. You literally become a carrier of H1N1 if you choose this method of the vaccine. It "sheds" for up to 21 days, which means that as you move around society, you are spreading the virus. It's a very low rate of transmission, and I've read anywhere from 0.5-3%. Since this is a brand new thing, I don't believe anyone knows for sure.

What does this mean to our family? Well, obviously we won't be getting the Flumist, if we choose to be vaccinated. It also means, that if you get the Flumist version, DO NOT COME NEAR MY FAMILY. ESPECIALLY MY CHILD! No ands, ifs, or buts about it. Please stay away for at least 3 weeks after you are vaccinated. Thanks!!!

We've been super busy lately, with my new job, and Eric's parents in town. It's been a great week, and we are sad to see them leave in the morning. I hope to make it to Merry Marketplace tomorrow, and we want to take Drake to the pumpkin patch. I hope the weather is nice this weekend! Stay tuned for some more blog posts coming up. I have one with some big news, and one all about car seats.

Frustrated

I cannot even begin to explain my frustrations of yesterday. Thank God for this amazing Dr. Rogers who came into my life at just the right moment! I've been coughing for a week now, and yesterday my throat and right ear really started to hurt. I knew immediately that it was either strept throat or tonsillitis. And probably an ear infection. I called my drs office here, and after 2 1/2 hours they still hadn't returned my call. When I got off work, I just headed over there. I figured one of three things would have to happen. They'd either work me in, just give me an rx, or tell me to go to urgent care. The first thing to ruffle my feathers a bit is that the girl at check in was a tee-total-bitch. She was livid that I just showed up. Well, if your staff would have called me back, then this wouldn't be an issue. If I had a fever, or chills, or any true flu symptoms, I would've never gone in public. But here's the deal: I'm an educated health care professional, and I know my body. I knew damn well I didn't have the flu.

So, they move me to a separate room where I'm all alone. No biggie; actually a smart move on their part. I wait 15 minutes, then a nurse shows up with two pieces of paper. One is a prescription for Tamiflu (the treatment for swine flu). The other is an order, so I can go to the hospital and get tested for the swine flu. She instructs me to start taking the medicine immediately, without waiting for results. Also a decent idea, IF ONLY I HAD THE FRIGGIN FLU!!! I was livid. I looked at her in disbelief, and said "Do you realize that not ONE person has asked me about my symptoms, or examined me or assessed me?" She had nothing to say for about 10 seconds. Then she looks down, and says that her papers say I've had a fever and cough. WRONG! No fever you ding-dongs. I proceed to tell her (she still hadn't asked) what my symptoms were, and the history of this particular illness. I told her that what I needed was actually an antibiotic. She went back to talk to the doctor (who still wouldn't see me, I think she's afraid of swine flu), only to come back and say tough stuff. No antibiotic, but we will add a strept screen to your lab orders. Well, thanks alot. Thanks for your superb care, and listening to your patients. I asked where I was supposed to go for these tests, since they couldn't do them. Oh, just the hospital. No biggie she says, just register as an outpatient. I was beyond livid at this point. It was such horrible care. I hope and pray I NEVER give such inadequate care to a patient of mine.

So I get in my car still fuming. I drive my fuming self right on over to some place called "Doctors Care". It's an urgent care center, and I'm now in love with that place. I see this fabulous man named Dr. Rogers, who has been a pediatrician and family doctor for over 45 years. He comes in, and first asks me about all my symptoms. NOVEL idea there. He then looks in my throat and eyes, and informs me I have a strept infection. Such a shocker. He then looks in my ears, and says I have ear infections. And then this kind and amazing man gives me a prescription for an antibiotic. Thanks for doing an assessment and listening to me. I feel better already, after just three doses of Amoxicillin.

I know and understand that the H1N1 flu is serious, and can be life threatening. I get it. I don't get a refusal to listen to your patients, or to assess them. That's just unacceptable.

Working Woman

I started my job today, but there isn't much to report. I did the whole hospital orientation thing, then headed over to the department for about 30 minutes. Tomorrow is more paperwork, and finding my way around. Hopefully by Wednesday I'll be back to knocking people out!

Drake has been going to bed so early! Between 6 and 7. He's just so tired after dinner and a bath, that he sacks out with the last bottle. He does stay in the crib 12 hours, but sometimes he will wake up a couple of times. He's usually back asleep within 5 minutes. About 1-2 times per week he will throw a massive fit, and get to sleep with mommy and daddy for the rest of the night. We all love it, to be honest, but are trying not to start that habit. I really hope to take some photos of him soon and get them up.

Eric and I are headed to Greenville this weekend for my friend Adriann's wedding. That will definitely be a good time!

We joined the big fitness center here today. Big thumbs down to them not having an outside pool. I miss the Y's in Charlotte something fierce. We didn't know how good we had it with the gyms there! I've been pondering lately. If I'm "home", then why am I so homesick? I'm assuming we just need to give it a little more time to settle in here. For it to only be 2 and 1/2 hours from Charlotte, these two places could not be more different. It's hard to explain, but I feel as if I've been having a major culture shock. I forgot so much about Florence, and it's people and places. It is SO different from Charlotte, in SO many ways. I'm not saying it's all bad, just very different. I just feel like the people, from our neighbors to friends to coworkers, just all "get" Eric and I, like people here don't seem to. Of course, there are the exceptions, like my parents and old friends from college. I'm gonna give it all the benefit of the doubt, and assume we just need to give people more time to get to know us. One big positive; we are loving having the grandparents nearby. Eric's parents come next week, and we can't wait! Although I have no idea what they will do here for a week. I guess just play with Drake! My parents will probably take them to the beach for a night or two.

I can't wait to get my schedule for work. I'm going to plan a nice long romantic weekend at Grove Park Inn and spa. I see a massage and pedicure in my future!

How refreshing; and a little more on H1N1

It seems that there are a few people that take my blog for what it is; a chance to share what works for my family. It was really refreshing to read positive feedback for a change. Here is what one dear soul had to say:

"Niki-
I have to tell you thank you for your blog. I have been reading it for quite awile now. (I was WTTC around the time you got pregnant so I saw you in WTTC grads). I do not plan on doing everything you have done as a mother, I am just not the "crunchy" person, but I totally respect all of your choices and opinions. I do not understand how anything you said can be seen as anything more than your opinion. You have stated more than once that the things written are how YOU feel about life and never once have I felt as though you have been trying to push your ways on anyone else. However your blog alone it the reason I started doing my own research on a number of things, NCB, cloth diapering, delaying vax's and not starting solids till 6 months for example. I learned things that I had NO clue about thanks to you and I feel as though it will help me to be a better mother to my daughter just because I now can make truly educated choices. Please do not let people get you down and keep blogging just as you have been, people are truly learning from it and I hate that some women are so childish that they feel as though they have to belittle you for what you think.
Sorry this got so long but I wanted to let you know that you are doing a great job no matter what anyone else may say."

And another person who "gets me",
"Nikki, I already posted to this thread, but wanted to say that I love your blog. I check it all the time and I have never thought you have belittled anyone! You state what works for your family but you don't say that has to work for everyone. I think some people just like to feel attacked to make themselves feel better about their choices."

Another positive thing has happened lately. I've had not one but two people actually ask my opinion, or what I've found in research about the h1n1 vaccines. One momma pointed out that she didn't know there were variations of the vaccine. Well, most mommy's wouldn't. I guess they have a blind faith in their pediatrician to just make decisions for them, but this momma does not. We don't do any vaccines with thimerosal, or squalene, and is this is why.

The multi dose vials of vaccines often have "preservatives". The most well known is thimerosal. Here is what that is, in a nutshell, courtesy of the FDA's website.
"Thimerosal is a mercury-containing organic compound (an organomercurial). Since the 1930s, it has been widely used as a preservative in a number of biological and drug products, including many vaccines, to help prevent potentially life threatening contamination with harmful microbes. Over the past several years, because of an increasing awareness of the theoretical potential for neurotoxicity of even low levels of organomercurials and because of the increased number of thimerosal containing vaccines that had been added to the infant immunization schedule, concerns about the use of thimerosal in vaccines and other products have been raised. Indeed, because of these concerns, the Food and Drug Administration has worked with, and continues to work with, vaccine manufacturers to reduce or eliminate thimerosal from vaccines."

Now, from what the package inserts are saying, these H1N1 vaccines don't have squalene. At least from what I can tell from reading their reviews. So, that isn't an issue.

So, if the FDA is working with manufacturers to eliminate thimerosal from vaccines, why is it in the new H1N1 multi dose vials? Two answers: speed and money. Drug companies can make the vaccine faster and cheaper by doing it in a multi dose vial.

I'm not a mom that believes in some autism and vaccine conspiracy. I just believe in researching (alot) to find out what is best for my child. Not your child, but my child. And I just happen to believe that asking for a single dose syringe of the H1N1 vaccine is best for him. Here's hoping his peds office has it!

For additional info, here is what Dr. Sears has to say:
http://www.askdrsears.com/thevaccinebook/